Francesca Romano

Chapter 51 | Child's Mind

Francesca's point of view.

At birth, the average baby's brain is about a quarter of the size of the average adult brain. Incredibly, it doubles in size in the first year of life. It keeps growing to about 80% of adult size by age 3 and 90% by age 5. Each area of the brain has millions of brain cells, or neurons which are connected to each other by synapses. At birth a baby has 100 billion brain cells but few connections between these cells. It is your love, affection and closeness for a baby that helps wire up the connections. I love kids really but a child of my own just seems irrational. I'm almost afraid of kids, I get my birth control implant changed six months before it expires just in case.

As I stood in the middle of my operating room with baby Zena asleep as I stitched her up ready for her mom back in the waiting room, I couldn't help but wonder how it feels to be a mom. I wouldn't say my mom failed as a mother, she tried. Though while she was trying she became a first degree murderer. I placed in the last stitch of several and took a deep breath before checking her heart rate which was steady. She was alive, and was going to live a full life so her mother out there can be proud. I placed my tools down and everyone in the room clapped as we as a team saved another life. It wasn't just me, it was all of us. Even Zena.

I washed my hands and walked out. In the pocket of my scrubs I felt my phone ring, it was my mom. I ignored and walked up the stairs to my office. She called again. I sucked my teeth and gave in, answering her call. "Francesca Vincent Romano, sei pazzo? Sorry for the full name but oh my, bambino." She yelled to me. "No ma, no one is insane." I rolled my eyes walking into my office. I was taken aback when I saw King sitting in my chair with his head in his arms, asleep. "Francesca, you're twenty two in a few weeks. I need your help planning this party." I could hear her flipping through clothes on a rack, probably looking for dresses. I rubbed my hand slowly on King's back, waking him up. I sat on my table in front of him as he stretched his arms.

"Mom, I just got out of surgery, I've been busy." King scooted in the chair and laid his head on my lap, wrapping his arms around me. "And I understand that I'm so proud of you, but bambino you can answer your phone at times." I held my phone between my ear and shoulder as I pushed both my hands through his hair and placed my feet on the arm rest of the chair. "No worries. Tomorrow we are going dress shopping." I shook my head as I felt his hands run up my back underneath my scrub top. "No ma, I have surgery again. I can't. But I promise after that you have me to dress up like an American doll." King chuckled in my lap. "How disrespectful. Bambino I'm going to burn all those half dresses you walk around in and dress you so beautifully for your big day."

"Bye Vanessa." I hung up the phone and let out a sigh of defeat. I was so tired and my mom wanted me to celebrate another dead end day. "I think you'd look like the most beautiful American doll ever." He said standing up and hovering over me. "Why are you out of bed?" I asked lifting up his shirt. "Can't stand being in there." He groaned. He wasn't bleeding any more and he was healing fast. However he's drugged up on the worlds best and strongest morphine. I dropped his shirt and looked up at him with a small smile. "How was work?" He asked, lowering himself down on me and kissing my neck. "Good." He pulled my legs up and dropped me back on the table. "And?" He lowered my pants down to sit in my hips, exposing my v line. "It's dirty work. She lived, that's all." He kissed my waist and traced my v line with his tongue. I shut my eyes and took in a sharp breath. I wanted him to continue but I had loose ends for the night, lots of paperwork, and he wasn't a hundred percent.

"But work made me tired." I said lifting my pants and placing my foot on his chest pushing him back into his seat. "Take a day off." He sighed as I took the stacks of papers from my drawers and a pen, sitting back on the table in front of him. "All I do is take days off now with you guys. You guys ruined my streak." He laughed as I spread out the documents of Zena in front of us. It was mostly my name they wanted on several pieces of paper. If anything was wrong they could easily throw these papers back in my face and say it was all my fault. It's never happened but, it could. "I could feel you staring at me." King sat up in the and leaned back, running a thumb across his jaw as I looked up at him.

"You're so beautiful. I don't mean beautiful, I mean you're beyond what my words can make of. You're so pure, innocent, and divine. You're just full of perfection and formosity." I was at a loss for words. For someone to look at me, like really look at me and tell me that it felt good. Felt good to be appreciated and wanted by someone. I loved the feeling. I love his words. I loved-. Before I could finish my thought he asked me a question.

"Why did you ever become a doctor?" I snapped out my trance and continued with the documents. "Like everyone says, to save lives." I chuckled. "None of that tv bullshit. You did it for you, why?" That question again. 'Why?' I had no reason to lie to him, and saying it out loud would only help me accept the truth as well.

"Maybe if I didn't I'd be a murder." I chuckled and so did he. "Why's that?" I took a deep breath and looked at Him. "This is an escape. Being able to have blood cover me as I cut someone open and remove and put their minds together like a puzzle is so beautiful to me. And saving their lives is ten times better than just the blood because without me they would die." He tilts his head and stays quiet. I had so much more to say but I didn't, just looked at him. "You can tell me anything." I looked up at the ceiling and intertwined my fingers. "My father, he isn't winning any father of the year awards. He's the reason I'm so protective of Giovanni. He was an alcoholic, beat on me and my mom, told us our natural hair was ugly and any other insults he could bring up. He said I'd be nothing." A small dirty smirk grew on my face.

"I know it's so wrong but, seven times out of ten I think the person on the table is my father. That I'm the one pulling him apart limb by limb, his blood drowning me. But then I put him back together and do it over and over again. He deserves to feel pain like that every fucking day he doesn't deserve to be resting in peace. He doesn't." He took my hands and kissed them as I looked down at him. "Didn't he see what was right in front of him? So pretty, talented, and brave. You are and will always be something, doc."