Professor Malfoy

15 | kisses and potions

Chapter 15
____________

It comes as a no surprise to me when Blaise and Pansy start kissing on a couch just in front of the eyes of everyone. Whatever happened between them two when I left with professor Malfoy yesterday, she didn't tell me.

I was pretending to be deep asleep when she tipsy walked to our room in the middle of the night, giggling and talking to herself. I could smell the feast from her, all the alcohol and candy mixed together. I didn't let her know that I was awake, that I haven't closed my eyes for the rest of the night.

She would ask questions about my night, and I wasn't prepared to talk about what happened. Or more like, what almost happened, but didn't.

I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to talk about it without feeling shame all over me. I keep telling myself that I'm not the only one guilty. He's in it, too, and he's the one who's married. Yes, I might have Theo, I might have manipulated him into a relationship with me, but I don't have any children, I'm not bound to him in any way. The professor has written "cheat" all over him every time I look at him, I feel bad for his wife, whoever the hell she is.

No. It's not my fault. Not fully. I'm not saying I'm innocent in this, but he's way worse.

The words of the fortune teller keep appearing in my mind.

Everyone will know.

I know it's bad, strongly illegal and morally wrong. I know it can ruin both of our lives for good. I know it all, I keep reminding it every time I look at that handsome face of his.
But the more I allow myself to think of him, the more my mind imagines him, his strong muscular body, cold veiny arms, that full lips asking to shatter me. Shatter me whole.

"So...I've been thinking about us," Theo, sitting next to me, says all of sudden and turns his body toward mine.

For a moment, I forgot there's any "us".

"Hmm?" I mumbled, allowing him to speak more. "We should go on a date,"

"A date?" Those words leave my mouth surprised, as it's something absurd.

I take a quick glance at Pansy and Blaise sitting a meter from us on another couch in front of the huge fireplace of our common room.
They're getting really into it - Blaise's hand is on Pansy's neck, his mouth is slowly moving from hers to her ears, then lower and lower.

We're the only ones in here since it's Sunday midnight, so I guess that's why they're so comfortable. We're practically invisible for them.

Her lips on his, she seems to be enjoying it. I wonder if she likes kissing me as much. It's not even a full 24 hours that passed since our mouths were connected on that carousel.

"What do you think?" Theo keeps digging me from my thoughts.

"Sure, we can," I mumble and try to smile at him.

His eyes are sleepy, which reminds me how late it is already. We haven't done anything the whole Sunday, everyone was hungover from the feast, I'm not sure if I even had anything to eat. Food seems to me like the last thing I think about these days. Hunger doesn't get to me.

"You look tired," I whisper to him.

I raise my hand toward his face and gently stroke his cheek. His eyes are staring into mine, examining my every move, my every blink. His left side of his face shines with green light coming from the cracking fire. Besides it, there's no other source of light.

"We should go to sleep," he agrees and yawns his whole mouth open.

"But Pansy-"

"They're 100% fucking tonight. Zion took some sleeping pills,"