Professor Malfoy

17 | goodnight

Chapter 17
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I already knew before laying into my bed that I won't get much sleep tonight. When I left the bathroom, I got back to Theo, pretending that everything is fine. For him, only a few couple of minutes passed because of the professor's spell on every person in the bar. But for me, it was 20 minutes of horror and blood, lots of blood. I won't get its burgundy color from my mind anytime soon.

We left Hogsmeade short after that and he walked me to my room in a complete silence. I wanted to talk, I wanted to tell him that the date was great and none of this is his fault, I really did. I have to make it up to him.

With a sigh, I roll on the other side of my bed and put my arm under my cold pillow. Everything is cold, even under my sheets. I feel like my body heat froze the moment I saw Antony. I open my eyes that I forced to shut a while ago and try to look for Pansy.

"Pans?" I whisper, facing her bed.

When my eyes adjust to the darkness in this room, I realize I forgot she's not there. I'm alone while everyone's sleeping at the boys room.

Come to my office...

I don't even know if my door is locked. Anyone could enter in and...where's Antony? What did professor do with him after I left? I really hope he erased his memory and sent him
somewhere far, far away from me and Pansy.

And there it is, again. I gently stroke my painful wrists from his firm grip and from when his nails buried into my skin. I checked my body twice in the shower for more wounds and bruises, but apart from the one on my throat and cheek, I'm fine. Or at least I look fine.

I can't think of this anymore, I have to occupy my mind with something as soon as possible.

Come to my office when you find yourself hurt.

All of sudden, I feel vomit traveling all the way from my stomach toward my mouth. I quickly put my hand over my shoulder and sit up on the bed. I already vomited three times tonight, I'm sure I've gotten everything out of my system.

Never in my life have I though that something like this would happen to me. I knew things like that happen on a daily basis, we just don't have that many cases in the Wizarding world. It was a Muggle thing.

If it wasn't for my stupidity, if I didn't leave my wand on the table, none of this would happen. That only makes me think of how vulnerable, weak I am without magic.

Maybe I could've fought him, kicked him in between his legs. But as soon as his hand landed on my mouth, I couldn't move from the shock. I was acting like a coward.

And then he came and did everything for me.

Come to my office...

I keep thinking about his offer the whole night, but only now I'm finally willing to stand up and get out of my room. I need somebody, I can't be alone. Not tonight.

I put my white bathing robe around my body and silently walk out of the common room. The castle is quiet, but not soulless. I keep seeing the ghosts of Hogwarts, flinching every time I notice their blue-like transparent body crossing my path.

By the time I get to his office, I'm shaking from the cold. I don't understand why it is so hard to heat up the whole castle. We're wizards, it surely can't be that hard.

I brush through my hair and raise my fist to knock on the door. After a few knocks, I wonder if he's even here. He might be home, he might've just said to come to his office to make me feel better, he might've...