When you realise

45. A Sad Story

I had every intention of going out last night, but as I was walking toward the exit of the hotel, images of Hunter came into my head, the look of him being heartbroken each time I rejected him, the look he gave me when I told him I had slept with someone else the night of his birthday, I didn't want there to be any chance of that happening again.

I also didn't feel like returning home, Damian and I have never had an argument before, he has never spoken to me that way. I am still trying to process what happened and what I am meant to say to him next time I see him.

I ended up coming to my office and packing everything I need moved over to the new office building, it turned out to be a good distraction and I managed to get most of it done.

I had a few moments when I needed to stop so I could wipe the tears from my eyes. I am just so confused.

A knocking at my door tore me from my thoughts, I held my breathe, I have already spoken to Mel today and told her I don't want to be disturbed and asked her to tell Damian to handle my meetings, I am in no condition to see anyone today.

"Baby doll, please open up" I heard Damian pleading from behind the locked door. I closed my eyes as a single tear rolled down my face and I let out the breathe I was holding.

I stood from my chair and walked to the door instead of unlocking it, I rested by back against it. I know I need to see him eventually but right now I still am trying to figure out what to do.

I felt relief come over me when I heard Mel tell Damian that I did not want to be disturbed today.

The moment I knew Damian would be in a meeting, I made my way out of the office and up to my room to freshen up. I know everyone was looking at me, but i just couldn't care today, my head feels like a whirlpool.

After showering and freshening up I felt somewhat human again, I really need to talk to Damian, but that is going to have to wait until tonight, just the thought of us fighting in tearing me up.

I don't have much left to pack in the office and hopefully by the time I get back what I have already packed has already been taken over to the new office.

I really wish I had something to distract me, all the thoughts running through my head, my anxiety has never been this high before, I keep picturing Damian hating me and Hunter hating every part of me because, as it was put, 'I am a stuborn bitch'.

I once remember when I was younger and I was having issues with my mother I would always bake something, more than anything to make her proud of me, not that those words ever exited her lips at all, but I constantly wanted her to acknoledge me, more than, being the accident she wished she never had.

I felt at that level that I needed to be in the kitchens, maybe Antonio can give me a funny story about my grandfather to cheer me up, so without any more thought, I made my way down to the kitchens.

"Ah Miss Eliana, what do we owe the pleasure of you coming down here today" Antonio pleasently greated me as a made my way in the kitchens.

"um, I just wanted to know if you needed any help" I said a little quieter than what I meant for it to come out.

Antonio's face dropped by the tone of my voice, "Eliana".

"Please" I pleaded when I heard the tone in his voice "Please tell me about my grandfather". The only other time I have asked Antonio about him was the year after I graduated and I didn't know if I was doing anything right. I wasn't able to get loans to rebuild or buy anything else, the hotel was failing and I blamed myself.

Antonio managed to lift my spirates up and re-motivate me, everything else I learnt about my grandfather he has gradually told me over the years.

"I'll tell you one thing about him" Antonio sighed "everytime he would think about you and what he did to your mum, he would come in here with that very same look that you have on your face right now and he would ask me if I needed any help, just like you are now"