Count down to the dream

Living in her memories

POV of Seong

It has been a year; she left me. Still don't know why? I promised her I won't let her be sad again, but still; I miss her a lot. On my world tour and concerts in different countries, I always try to find her in the crowd, but no, I couldn't. Each day becomes harder for me to survive without her. Everyone who knows me advises me to move on from her. Even mom, at first she also had a hope to find Paapa for me but later she ended searching and told me to move on from Paapa. Now mom realized how much I am into paapa when I lost her. For some months I canceled all the schedules, become an alcohol addict. It was the only way for me to skip reality. On taking each shot, I felt her presence. The moments we spend together become shown in my mind. But as time passed, I started hallucinating her, like talking and spending time with her. I loved that feeling. She was with me the entire time. But brothers took me to a rehabilitation center, intense training, meditation and medication. Around 6 months to get back to sense, still I can see her by visualizing the time we are together. She was always with me, never left alone in mind. My company took so much effort to keep this from our fans, if they found out it would cause many troubles for us. Whatever it is, I am not gonna move on from her. She is the only one for me. To reduce my addiction, I started new hobbies to avoid my distractions, at last tried drawing and painting but may because I am not enough good for that or might be not interested I stopped it, it was really hard for me to find something distracting my thought finally found one kickboxing, you might ask why it never distract me from thing about her, that always make me feel she is there near to me. She is good in self defense, so kickboxing makes me feel like a home of relief.

"Hyung, 3 more minutes. Get ready. We have to go up there." Dal never left my side. Dae always stays with me. I am at a concert here in Las Vegas. The last day of the concert here. My fandom is still crazy over us. They send card flowers at the concert. Also, there are so many placards of their requests. I really enjoyed this but if she was here with me, then the moments should be more beautiful... While singing 'You belong to me' and 'where were you being' wishes to see her in the crowd, these songs are now included in Billboard music, all the emotions and words in those are the message for my love, the words I want to tell her. There so many people started suspecting my affair, but I can't announce. Right? I had an affair, but how can I explain it to them? She left me alone uttering nothing or I am trying to move on from her? Don't know. Let's meet after the concert guys. I'm getting late.

The concert went well. In the crowd, I noticed one kid wearing my Paapa's face printed shirt. I smiled and waved to her. cute right? That day on the way back home, I got a call from the doctor to come back there. She tried to commit suicide. The wound was deep and cut the vein. She lost consciousness before the nurse noticed. After getting normal, the only thing she said was, need a break-up, and she is not deserving of me. Left the hospital the very next day. Some days later, I got an email from her, saying why she want to break up and explaining why she doesn't deserve to be with me. Doesn't get any reply to my mail? I explained everything. How I felt about her? How deep I'm into her, everything. The things that happened won't change my love; I repeated many times to her. But she doesn't reply. Maybe she needs time or remains adamant about her decision. A long one year, waiting for her, checking mails and places to see her once, to know if she was happy or not. All went in vain, but still my heart was beating for her.

"Hey Seongshii! Long time, no see"

"So-Ho sunbaenim!! Long time, no see. Are any of your students taking part here?"

"Ye! My dearest. You had a concert here, right? How was it?"

"Good, when is he gonna get into cage fighting? It's been a long time to see you and your students here, for 2 years. I'm excited to see the fight"

"Next one, is that Min Yoon, madam?" He nodded. That's so rare to see So-Ho sir's wife. They both are business magnets, many firms and industries like clothing, fashion, medical, educational centers, especially martial arts schools and more. But both are so humble and kind. I knew him after joining kickboxing. My trainer is his student and introduced me to him some months ago. We got to know each other more after that. We first met around 2 years before in an award show but mostly he might forget that meeting. Definitely I won't because I've been his fan for a longtime.

"Ya, that's her. Does she look so tense?" I nodded. "I should go then. Don't wanna make her sad and alone. See you after the fight." This man, definitely you got that why I respect him this much. He won't leave his wife alone. Still lovey-dovey after a successful 30 years marriage. So lovely, he always inter-whined his finger on Ma'am's hand. While seeing them, I miss my paapa. I want to give my attention and care so much to her. Miss you.

Forget to tell you I am in MMA, I love to see fights. They won't show mercy while fighting. It is mixed martial arts. So-Ho sir has continuously been part of this. For the last 8 year except the last two years. Mostly his students knock out the opponents within 3 rounds. That's why I am so obsessed to see his student's fight today.