Beckoned Through The Dark

71 // Lesego // Uninvited

For the next few days, I started to have visions and flashbacks. It was so confusing, because it was messing with my sanity.

The morning I was supposed to meet up with Sihle, I wasn't well, and it was not helping that I had a nightmare last night. On top of that, my mom's creepy invasion.

I was not feeling well.

I was having trouble putting together puzzles of my life, the most frustrating thing was trying to pin these flashbacks and visions to the exact timeline.

The worst one hit me in the early morning while I was bathing.

It was very strange because it felt like reliving some moments in my life for the second time.

This one took place in high school and involved Sihle and Clay.

I remember I'd arrived late that day and had to report to the principal's office before my first class. It was almost lunchtime, and I really needed to use the bathroom. As soon as the bell rang, I ran out of the classroom only to find Clay waiting for me in the passage.

"I have been waiting for you; I thought you would never come," He said, folding his arms across his chest.

He watched me with his serious brown eyes, and I just frowned in response.

I walked past him and rushed into the bathroom. When I was done, I found him standing near the basins.

Really? Did he seriously just follow me into the girls' bathroom?

He raised a questioning eyebrow as if waiting for me to say something. "Really? After you left me standing alone outside like a fool? You got me into trouble with my mother!" I yelled.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Oh, stop playing victim here. If I remember well, you were the one who left me when you saw that little boyfriend of yours and then when you saw that he wasn't paying attention to you, you decided that you were going to use me as an escape from your misery!" My heart ached as he raised his voice at me, his words echoing throughout the bathroom.

He barely ever yelled at me; he always kept his cool around me.

I opened and closed my mouth like a fish, and that seemed to aggravate him. "Oh! So, you aren’t going to say anything?" He took careful steps towards me, caging between the wall and basins. "Well, that’s okay with me, because I have a lot to say to you!" Without warning, his lips met mine in a rough, needy and demanding kiss.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back, but I couldn't keep up.

His lips were punishing, and I realized he was angry.

I did not know that I had hurt him this much.

This was always our game, some days we played cat and mouse, and on others we played hide and seek.

Our feelings were all over the place, and it was difficult for us to be together. Clay was trying to keep up appearance and maintain his popular reputation at school while I was hell-bent on defying my mother's wishes.

He pulled away from me, leaving me breathless.

Only then did I realize why he kissed me. This was his ultimate revenge for when I kissed Sihle this morning when I saw Clay walk into the school.

I'd over-stepped the line, and my actions had cut him deeper than I'd anticipated.

One look into his eyes, and I wished I could erase everything from yesterday and start over.

"Listen to me and listen very carefully, you have gone too far this time around. You'd better stop these games you are playing before somebody gets hurt. I'm tired of your silly games, and I'm this close to calling everything off."

Reality hits hard and the words cut through deeper than I could have ever imagined.

He was mad at me, his eyes were burning in fury, and I could tell he wanted to say so much more.

All I could do was cry – I cried to his pain. I cried to his words. I cried to his anger, and mostly – THE TRUTH.

I trembled in pain and anger.

Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, Sihle barged into the bathroom.

Someone must have alerted him, I just hoped he did not provoke Clay, because Clay had quite a temper.

He marched towards us and pushed Clay out of the way before standing in front of me in defence. "I think it's about time you accepted the fact that she chose me and not you," he said hotly.

Could this get any worse? Sihle was here to defend me. I knew they were going to fight, but I couldn't stand a fight.

I was too weak and broken to entertain it, but what could I possibly do?

"Sihle, please don't do this." I tried to walk past him, but he blocked me with his hand.

"No, I won't stand for this any longer, her heart chose me – she chose me." I could see Clay's face turning redder by the minute, and knew he was bound to burst any second now. "The sad part is that her mother chose you, so I don't know," Sihle gloated.

"Enough, Sihle!" I pushed past him and stood between them. "Stop this, right now!" I warned, but they both ignored me.

The tension in the bathroom was enough to open a portal to another dimension, hopefully that wasn't a hospital bed or prison cell.

But from the look of things, it would be either one of the two, because they were both fuming. Silence reeked the room as we were the only people there, unfortunately.

Without warning, Clay pushed me out of the way and threw a punch at Sihle.

Sihle staggered against the washing island and then responded alike, and then the fight broke.

"Stop what you are doing! Stop it please, Clay. Sihle?" I cried, not knowing what to do.

If I ran out to alert the teachers, chances were that by the time I came back, someone would have died.

I continued to shout at them, but they did not listen. Out of frustration, I tried to get in the middle, but Clay pushed me again, and this time very rough as I hit the wall and instantly fell down, banging my head on a corner of the waiting benches.

My vision started to blur, and the last thing I heard was someone said, "Thatohatsi!"

I plunged out of the water like a fish, my breath caught in my throat.

I quickly turned off the tap and opened the stopper in the bathtub to release the water.

I nearly flooded the bathroom, but that was not even the least of my worries. I was never able to hold my breath under water before, I couldn't even swim.

What bothered me more was hearing that name again. Thatohatsi.

It did not feel so foreign anymore and felt like I was befitted of the name.

Something was off. I was still quite young when that accident happened, I couldn't have been older than twelve, and yet I did not remember until now.

I needed to consult, I had to go and see Abigail at Clay's place.

I quickly got out of the bathroom and dried myself, and then I changed into tracksuits and jogged downstairs.

Everyone was still asleep except for...mom?

"Lesego, just the person I want to see, I was just coming to your room." She met me at the end of the staircase.

"Mom, I can't talk right now, I have to go," I said hastily.

She grabbed my hand and led me downstairs. "Before you do, there's someone I want you to meet."

Before I could even ask, a familiar face showed from the sitting room.

I stumbled back as if I'd just seen a ghost. "What is she doing here?" I asked breathlessly.

"Lesego, I invited Karabelo over because she has something to show you," mom said.

"And why should I believe anything coming from her?"

Karabelo stepped up, but I took a step back. "Because I am also a victim just like you."