Taming Chaos // J.M // The 100

Chapter 87

"So let me get this straight." With his chest threatening to cave into itself, Ethan doesn't know whether to jump in joy or scream until his lungs give out.

He paces, instead, fingers pressed to his lip, "For the four months I was away, you guys managed to attack Mount Weather; kill another three hundred innocent people, letting TondC and its villagers be killed in order to do it,"

The silence is his answer.

Ethan knew a lot had happened during the time he and Murphy were held captive by Jaha, but this was. . .

"You," He gestures without looking towards Clarke. He doesn't want to correlate one of his best friends with another massacre. "Were marked this mighty Wanheda because of your choices, and left camp 'cause your guilt was too much to handle; and you-" Ethan flicks a shaky finger at Bellamy, "-became Pike's bitch after Ice Nation blew up Mount Weather, because of guilt."

Ethan is given one hell of a murderous glare for that one, but his heart is beating too fast for it to faze him, "Moving on, the truce was lost, but in its place, Skaikru joined Lexa's coalition as the thirteenth clan. She sent Indra and her warriors - the very same people who helped me - to protect you guys from Ice Nation, and instead of being grateful, you and Pike decided to up your kill count by, yet again, another three hundred?"

It's getting incredibly hard to breathe in the small space of the room. The door is shut. Locked?

Please don't be locked. Am I locked in again?

The walls must be closing in.

Ethan swipes a hand across his nose, kneads at his chest with his other hand, and doesn't stop talking because he still has one very important question.

"And all forty-seven of the people I mourned over are in fact alive and roaming these halls?"

Somewhere, someone nods.

The room is spinning too much to notice who.

Am I locked in?

Ethan shoves himself away from the desk and towards the door.

"Where are you going?" He hears Clarke.

Bellamy grabs his arm and yanks him back but Ethan only retaliates by ripping himself away from the threat, "I only just found out my friends were alive, where do you think I'm going?"

He shares a quick glance with Clarke.

Perhaps he'd finish the mission and end Pike himself.

Ethan shudders out a quick breath when the door does, in fact, open.

He's free - and halfway out the door when he decides to lean back inside, as an afterthought, "For the record, going with Jaha was neither mine nor Murphy's choice. That note was not mine. . . I would've expected you two to realise that."

With that, he slams the door shut, and heads for the end of the hall where Octavia stands watch.

Pushing off the wall, Octavia lifts a perfect brow and waits patiently for him to limp his way over, pressed back with the force of his arms fastening around her shoulders.

"Everything's changed and I don't know what I'm supposed to do." Ethan tugs her in close, "There were kids at Mount Weather, Octavia." His hand twists in the leather of her jacket, "But selfishly, all I can think about is the fact that they're alive."

"Who?"

"Monty, Jasper, Harper, Miller -"

She pulls back, voice jumping in pitch, "You didn't know?"