The Birch's Petals

Forty Five

THE last time Zedina had been this nervous was when she was trying to get back together with Samantha, she had been staring at her reflection for the past forty minutes while trying out outfits for her meet-up with Jane.

After extremely long hours of talking to Lilian and Alicia about what she needed to do, to decide who she wanted to be with.

And, as much as it broke her to end things with Samantha after their secret rendezvous, she felt like it was the right choice.

Speaking of Samantha—she was left devastated, she felt like part of her body had been ripped out of her. She couldn’t count the hours she spent crying under her sheets.

It was a bright, warm afternoon, she had just gotten out of class when she received a vague text from Zedina asking her to meet up. Zedina sought to meet in her room, she didn’t want to do it in any public space.

“Hey Zee, you alright?” Samantha swallowed harshly, she could see it written all over her face—the guilt. She took deep, heavy breaths, and kept a calm mind—as calm as she could manage to keep her thoughts from wandering.

Zedina sighed, she didn’t know where to begin from. Here she was, in a situation she never expected to be in, hesitant to break the heart of the most beautiful girl she’d laid eyes on. She shut her eyes tightly and released a heavy breath, her heart hammered in her chest, and she felt the tightening in it spreading.

Samantha reached out for her hand and gently covered it with hers—oh the warmth that spread all over her body, the spark as they call it was still very much there—and she knew she would never stop loving her.

“You know you can tell me anything right?” Samantha smiled softly. “Anything.” She said.

“I know.” Zedina solemnly sighed.

“I—uh I, I think we need to end this.” She sighed heavily. Samantha suddenly felt cold, as though all the warmth in the world had been sucked, and all the brightness darkened. She wanted to cry, but couldn’t bring herself to.

Swallowing heavily, she whispered, “W-why?” Tears brimmed in her eyes.

“I can’t go through this again Sam. You know we can’t, not after last time.” It destroyed Zedina talking about their dreadful past but she had to break things off with her, even if it meant bringing up the one thing that she knew Samantha wouldn’t approve of.

“Last time?” Samantha cried. “Last time Zee? Really? I apologised, didn’t I, and I know apologies aren’t worth anything and not after what I did. But—but I thought, we were past that and you forgave me. Is that the real reason for you to end things?”

“No Sam, I—I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“Is it someone else?” Samantha asked with a heavy heart, she could tell there was someone else and the pain in her chest worsened. She thought her heart had been set ablaze and her body organs were shifting. Zedina looked away clenching her jaw, she nodded subtly.

Samantha drew in a sharp inhale; she suddenly couldn’t stop her tears from flowing. “Oh, God!” She quickly wiped her eyes and cheeks.

“I—I was going to . . .” Samantha gasped holding her chest and then bit on her trembling bottom lip. “I wanted to . . . uh—oh wow, do you still love me?”

“Of course, I love you, Sam, I don’t know if I’ll ever stop loving you. But, I want to be with someone who wants me back and Jane wants to be with me.”