Born A Weapon

Friend, oh friend, where have you gone

(tw: child abuse, torture, murder, serious injury, self-harm, neglect, violence, smoking, blood, manipulation)

Take the warnings very seriously, especially the highlighted ones

this is a long one so prepare

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11/07/1997 11:51

"Close your eyes; have no fear. The monster is gone; he's on the run, and your daddy is here."

A quote from the song "Beautiful Boy" by John Lennon, released on 11 April 1981. It meant that Delphini was not even a year old when this song hit the radio, and she had heard it every so often since then.

The radio was on in the living room when she secretly shifted the dial to pick up Muggle stations. The radio in her father's car was on whenever he was too focused on driving to change the channel. Muggle shops whenever she passed them before and after meetings. And now, as she lay on her bed staring into the perpetually grey skies outside Malfoy Manor, charmed to stay cloudy even in the hottest weather.

But what if your daddy was the monster, and he wasn't there? What if all your life you had been surrounded by people who valued their own selfish needs over your most basic ones? Being a toddler, starving and forgotten in a crib hidden away in a manor lying desolate from society, deep within a thick magical forest.

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."

But what plans did I have? What future would I have even if my father lost the war and I ran away for good? No job would take me with my last name and heritage. People wouldn't trust me well enough to consider me a friend.

Yeah, I had Luna, but a life with one person would get very lonely, very fast. And what about Remus and Sirius? Would they always wonder when I would overdose next or lose my marbles again? Would they always have a sedative on hand, just in case I freaked out again? Would they always carry naloxone just in case they found me on a dirty bathroom floor again?

What could one make of their life with mass murderers as parents? Even if they bettered their life and became a good person, would the judgment always follow just behind them in echoing footsteps?

My thoughts were interrupted by the glimpse of an owl in the distance flying towards my window. I stood up and stretched out my legs, feeling the familiar burn of new cuts stretching as the scabs broke from the motion. I hissed and looked down at the droplet of blood sliding down my left calf, quickly wiping it with the sleeve of my pyjama shirt.

Looking up, I realised who the owl was exactly by the shape of her beak, Hedwig.

I opened my window quickly as she landed on my arm, dropping the letter she had been carrying on the floor and giving a tired hoot as she flew and stood on my desk, picking at her feathers.

I bent down and picked up the letter. Seeing Harry's letter, I knew it was Harry's because he had written on top of the envelope "to delphini from Bambi." It was a teasing nickname only I had called him when we were 12

He hadn't used it in a while, and it immediately set me off because what could be so important that he would risk Hedwig just to get it to me. I stepped back, patting around for my bed, and sitting down as I ripped the envelope open without caring for how it ripped.

I quickly took the parchment out of the envelope. It wasn't letter paper but a note quickly ripped out of a notebook, and the letter was surprisingly short, leaving a large black space on the bottom.

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Dear Delphini N. Riddle,

I'm sorry to have to deliver this news, especially at a time that I know cannot be easy for you. However, I have been considering this for a very long time, and the events of last Christmas, as well as what happened recently after the incident in the cave, have only reinforced my decision.