madness and ecstasy // leo valdez

-dialogue-

this is a long one lol, 3.4k

<3

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"Ahhggggggh!"

Teqi leapt to her feet. She was already holding her knives, grabbed from where she'd hidden them under the couch cushions, before she registered what was happening around her.

She didn't know what was more jarring, the full sunlight that now bathed the room, or the screaming satyr.

Gleeson, or Hedge, or Coach, or whatever the hell she was supposed to call him now, was capering around on his furry hindquarters, swinging his club and yelling "Die!" as he smashed the tea set, sending golden china shards flying, whacked the shiny golden sofas, and charged at the throne.

Leo peeked around Teqi's legs. "Coach is awake."

"Coach!" Jason yelled.

Hedge turned, breathing hard. His eyes were wild, slitted pupils bouncing around before narrowing in on Jason. He was still wearing his sports jack, and his whistle was swinging like a pendulum. His horns were no longer hidden in his hair, and Jason looked like he was about to be impaled by them.

"You're the new kid," Hedge said eventually, lowering his club. "Jason."

He looked at Leo, who was still sitting cross legged on the ground behind Teqi, then Teqi, then Piper, and then the mess that was Piper's hair. To be fair, a whole new threat could've been hiding in that mess.

"Valdez, Teqi's last name, McLean. What's going on? We were at the Grand Canyon. The anemoi thuellai were attacking and—" He zeroed in on the storm spirit cage, and his eyes went back to KILL MODE. "Die!"

"Whoa, Coach!" Leo scrambled up and stepped in his path, which was pretty brave, even though Hedge was half a ruler shorter. "It's okay. They're locked up. I just sprang you from the other cage."

"Cage? Cage? What's going on? Just because I'm a satyr doesn't mean I can't have you doing plank push-ups, Valdez!"

Jason cleared his throat. "Coach—Gleeson—um, whatever you want us to call you. You saved us at the Grand Canyon. You were totally brave."

"Of course, I was!"

"The extraction team came and took us to Camp Half- Blood. We thought we'd lost you. Then we got word the storm spirits had taken you back to their—um... operator, Medea."

"That witch! Wait—that's impossible. She's mortal. She's dead."

"Yeah, well," Leo said with a shrug. "Somehow she got not dead anymore, and then she tried to make us kill each other, or mop her floors for three hundred years or whatever. But Teqi kicked her in the face a bunch and then knocked her out with her mind!"

Hedge nodded, his eyes narrowing conspiringly. "They do that sometimes. I blame the father. So! You were sent on a dangerous quest to rescue me, excellent!"

"Um." Piper stepped over half of the teapot, holding her hands up in surrender. "Actually, Glee—can I still call you Coach Hedge? Gleeson seems wrong. We're on a quest for something else. We kind of found you by accident."

"Oh." The coach's spirits seemed to deflate, but only for a second. Then his eyes lit up again with a renewed spark that made Teqi feel tired just watching. This level of energy could not be sustainable without substance intervention.