Chapter 34

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6:32. Felt good. I got up from my bed as I wanted to do something. I quickly got ahead of my mirror and summoned my gauntlet. Once I did that, I took out my soul, as expected, the both of them is golden. I gathered the magic around me to create a knife, I focused on the my soul as I did that. Once I created the knife, I saw my soul beating for one second. Sans did said that my soul is a portal connecting the Ambient Magic and my capability to use it. But I thought that even if I used Ambient Magic, my soul would react, probably telling itself that I used magic. That did make sense, the soul is the culmination of one's being, the motor of humans. If it didn't react to that, I would have some question. Well, I was a human augmented artificially.

I got to the kitchen to eat quickly my breakfast, I saw Mom, so we did the usual talk of the morning. Once I finished to eat, I put my dishes in the dishwasher. "Oh mom, I'm going to sleep at Chara's house this week-end." I said, I saw her smiling greatly. "That's nice son ! I'm happy to see you having fun with your girlfriend." She said, I could tell that she was actually proud of myself. After all, before the sister's appearance in my life, it was the same everyday. Not being social, complaining about school. But that changed, quite fast after all, it's been three weeks.

7:28. I was waiting for Chara and Frisk to show up at the crossroad. I was looking at Twitter for once, I looked at shitposts, people doing drama over nothing, the usual. I sighed as it became quite boring in a short time. I closed Twitter and turned off my phone, putting it in my pocket. I looked at the sky and it was quite grey, should've taken a jacket instead of a sweatshirt. Meh, I could only blame myself. "Y/N !" Frisk yelled, I looked at Frisk and saw Chara and her smiling and waving at me. I waived back as I waited for them to come closer. "How are ya ? Had a good week-end ?" Frisk asked. "You only missed Sunday you know ? But yeah, the greatest week-end I've had in a very long time." I said, looking at Chara. I smiled and kissed her. "Ow, seeing a boy being in love is cute~" Frisk said, her teases weren't as effective as she thought. "I am in love, yeah. I could say the same to David when he looks at you." I said. Frisk was smiling. "I know, we're so lucky Chara !" She yelled happily, hugging Chara tightly. Chara only laughed and asked Frisk to stop. "Fresh ... air ..." Chara said, taking deep breathes. "Gorilla grip Frisk." Chara said, I laughed very hard at that wording. "What's so funny ?" Chara asked. "It was funny." I said, purposefully suggesting that I was referring at the hugging scene. How the hell Chara can say that with a straight face.

*

"Y/N, you good ?" I heard Frisk asked me. I was spacing out on my plate of food. "Oh, yeah, sorry." I said, quickly taking a fork of noodles. "What are you thinking about ?" David asked. I sighed as I remembered our conversation on that subject yesterday with Chara. "Thinking of how am I gonna learn more about my thing." I said as I flashed the golden color of my soul. "Y/N, no. We talked about this." Chara said sternly. I did a quiet laugh as I smiled a little. "I know, Red. Just thinking of another ways." I calmly said, do I really have to wait ? What if, I don't know, something needed to be fought ? "Chara told me about that. So please, don't." Frisk gently said, I nodded as I didn't want my friend to worry about me. "What are you talking about ?" David asked, oblivious about the subject. "Basically, I want to learn more about my Power, but each solution is a no can do." I said as I took another bite of those noodles. "Can you reverse engineer your soul ?" David said. For some reason, that pissed me out a little. "You really think I'm a machine ?" I said, calmly but with some anger in my voice. "No, not at all, all I wanted to ask is can you remake your soul red ?" He said, panicking a little. I sighed a little. "No, if I did that, the same thing will happen, the flashbacks, the pain." I said as I finished my plate. "Don't worry, we'll find something to do." Chara said, taking my hand with hers, I smiled a little.

*

"Maybe in the records of the war we could find something ?" Frisk suggested, right now we're at the crossroad. "Like history books ?" I asked, Frisk nodded as Chara sighed. "Frisk, how will we access to those books ?" Chara asked, her tone was signaling me that it wasn't gonna be easy. "By asking mom and dad." She said, and then, realization struck her. She looked a little sad. "And you know how they feel about that." Chara said, finishing that subject. "Why are you focused on that by the way ?" Chara asked me. She looked serious, she wouldn't take an 'I don't know' as a response. "Well, I've got this feeling, increasing when I'm absorbing spells. That feeling causes me to push myself further. I want to know all the things I can about Ancient Power, the limits, the origins, the consequences of it. I want to learn spells. I want to learn how to fight with them." I said, explaining that feeling. "Huh, okay." Frisk said, she scratched her chin, seemingly thinking of what I've said. "To me, it sounds like Determination." Chara said. I looked at her and my look told her to continue. "You're determined to know, to learn and to understand what your power could do. You're determined to know how to use it properly, to use it when you need it. You're determined to do good things with it. If you ever thought that what you feel was you being hungry for power, you're wrong, you just want to protect everyone you care about." Chara explained. Her voice was serious, but soft. I could sense, in a way, that she was familiar with that feeling, she experienced it, she lived it. I smiled and I grabbed her and put her in a hug. I sighed as she found the exact words to hype me up. "Thanks Chara, you're the best." I said, kissing the side of her head. "That's what I do, and I'll always do it for you, N/N." She said, I couldn't help but to smiled widely, I love her. "Okay, Chara we need to go, mom asked us something important." Frisk said. "Oh yeah, okay." Chara responded, breaking the hug. She kissed me and smiled. "See you tomorrow okay ?" She said while approaching Frisk. "Of course, text me when you can." I said to Chara, she nodded and the sisters waved at me. I waved back as I made my way towards my home.

*

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*

I was sure of it now, I still got my Determination soul, just that Ancient Power was covering it, acting like a shield for it. But why ? I didn't know then. I just shrugged it off and thought that it wasn't important. But one thing was sure then.

I'll do everything I can to be stronger.

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