𝓤𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓵 𝓘 𝓯𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓭 𝔂𝓸𝓾 || 𝓡𝓮𝓶𝓾𝓼 𝓛𝓾𝓹𝓲𝓷

Christmas

It was Christmas morning and I didn't know how to feel. I wasn't excited, but I wasn't sad either.

I thought about not going to breakfast, but I knew dad and Remus would scold me.

I put on my gray sweatpants and pulled on a gray sweatshirt, I really didn't care about dressing fancy.

I put my hair up in a messy bun and made my way to the Great Hall. What I didn't expect was for tables being pushed together and everyone sitting around one table.

Before I could turn around, Dumbledore called my name. I put on a fake smile and took a seat next to father, in front of Remus.

Great.

"Merry Christmas everyone" I said and they said it back. My whole life I have been sitting with Professors, but I haven't felt this awkward for a long time.

"Is everything okay?" Dad asked from me quietly. I stopped eating for a moment, but then nodded. "come by my office at some point"

"Alright"

I looked up and my eyes looked into Remus's ones. I smiled a little and he nodded, holding a poker face on. From his eyes I saw the lust and happiness.

He moved slightly, his knee brushed against mine. I tried not to smile. And so the breakfast went. Remus teasing me and dad trying to hold a conversation with me.

The doors opened once again and it was professor Vincent who walked in. Professors greeted her happily. Remus nudged me with his knee and I looked at him.

"Everything alright?" He mouthed and I nodded. Soon, Matilde took a seat next to Remus. She smiled at him.

"Good morning Remus, how are you feeling?"

"Little bit tired, but other than that I am feeling good"

"Last night was a little rough I must say"

I hold my head down and listened their conversation. Remus told me he had some business to do, was he actually spending time with Matilde?

"Better than last times"

"Oh that for sure, I am glad you are feeling better now"

I slowly looked up to Remus and then glanced at Matilde. Remus sipped his coffee and looked at me. I quickly looked away and excused myself from the table.

I walked up to my dorm and searched for a quill and a parchment.

"Hi Theo!

I have a question, please don't tell dad about it. Is there a way you could get me few packs of cigarettes? Severus took all my packs from me.

Let me know!

V.S"

I quickly put on my coat and ran towards the owlery. I hated how far it was. I was out of breath once I arrived there.

I wrapped my letter around my owl's leg and sent him off, not before giving him few treats.

I walked back to my dorm, only to shrug off my coat, took few presents and make my way to dad's classroom.

I stepped in and smiled a little.

"Merry Christmas once again" I said and gave him his present. He gave me mine and we shared a quick hug.

"For who is this one?"

"For Abby, from Ravenclaw" I lied

"Yes, I've seen you two talking"

"Anyway, I hope you like it. I didn't really know what to get you"

"You know you don't need to buy me anything"

"I know, but you are my dad and I want you to show that even though we argue a lot- I still care about you"

"I know you do. I love you" he whispered and hugged me again.

"I love you too. Are you going to the Malfoy's tomorrow?"

"Yes"

I didn't stay there for long. I took my presents and now made my way to Remus' quarters. He wasn't in his classroom nor office so I quietly knocked on his quarter door.

He opened it rather quickly. He smiled at me, I tried to smile. I really tried.

"Merry Christmas" I said and gave him his present

"Thank you, you shouldn't have though"

"I wanted to"

I stepped into the room and bit my lip. The sheets were changed.

"Open it later, please" I said. He looked at me with confusion, but nodded and put it aside. He walked over to me, wrapped his arms around and started to lean down to kiss me, but I put my hands on his chest to stop him.

"What's wrong?" He asked quietly

"What did you do yesterday night?" He sighed and let go of me, turning his back to me for a moment.
"As I heard you were with Matilde"

"I was" he said quietly "NOT it that way" he turned to my quickly, eyes wide "gosh, not like that"

"Do you realize there's not much I could think about this situation, right? You write to me you have to run some errands and I completely understand, but then next morning a woman who likes you talks about your night together"

"Ven-"

"and then you refuse to tell me what happened"

"I see the way it seems like, but I didn't touch her- didn't even hug. I really had a busy night, she came and helped me"

"And I couldn't help?"

"I didn't want to bother you. You needed a good rest"

I looked away from him and let out a sigh. I ran my hand over my face.

"I'm sorry" I whispered so quietly, I didn't even think that he heard it.

"Don't worry" he whispered back and walked over to me. I lifted my gaze and Remus cupped my cheeks. He wiped away the tears and kissed my forehead. "Just don't think anything like that anymore, I wouldn't do this to you"

"I know, I'm s-"

"Don't apologize darling" we shared a sweet kiss. He pulled away and I watched as he walked over to his desk.

"I have something for you too"

"You shouldn't h-"

"I wanted to. Merry Christmas" i kissed his cheek and placed my gift next to his. I wrapped my arms around his neck and jumped onto his lap.

Remus kissed me and we made our way to his bedroom.

"We are not going to have sex" he said against my lips

"Why?"

"You aren't ready"

"And how do you know it?" I snapped and pulled away from him

"You had nightmares when you were sleeping here, you need some time"

"Remus pleas-"

"No"

And this was his final word.

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I am sooo tired, sorry for the shit chapter. I just wanted to publish it