Rêveries

Chapter 64.

On Monday, the day after Monza, we got into Charles' car and we drove nine hours to Chartres, outside of France. He had driven to Monza from Monaco to clear his head while driving, and now he's stuck with his car and we have to drive to Chartres, and then back to Monaco.

We got there late, but I met up with Evie as soon as I got there. We ended up kicking Charles out of our room, making him stay with Pierre for the night, it would be good for them on a night like this. They can talk about it. That's what Evie and I did. She had her head in my lap and I massaged her scalp while I just let her talk about everything going on in her life. Belgium, her family, Anthoine and then that scumbag that lied to the press to get some attention.

The next morning, we woke up early — which was very weird of us because we never ever do. But we decided to take a bath, do face masks and do our makeup together. Charles did come back to the room to collect his suit and his things to get ready. I put my black nylon tights on with the black dress I brought and I put a black cardigan over it. I put my hair up in a ponytail and I added a black bow.

We met up with the boys down in the lobby. They looked tired, exhausted, and the mood was down again. We got into a car that took us to the cathedral. A large, majestic cathedral, so extraordinary. There were people outside, showing their support, but even police had to be there to keep it under control. There was a large screen showing a picture of Anthoine with the Tricolore behind him. They would be allowed to hear the priest speaking from the outside.

Inside, there was a photo of Anthoine set up, and he was smiling at anyone coming through the door. The front row of chairs had helmets on them. They were the seats reserved for the drivers attending. We went with Charles and Pierre as they found their old helmets and where they'd be seated. Then we mingled lightly with the other people inside, like Max Fewtrell, who attended. Mick was there and it hurt to see him that sad.

Alain Prost attended the funeral as well, as well as Jean Todt from the FIA. He was at Jules' funeral too, and I remember being so mad at him, because they had just gone out and said that Jules' death was his own fault. I still struggle to look at him without feeling anger.

Evie and I sat down a few rows back and we held onto each other's hands during the ceremony. We could see Charles and Pierre drying their eyes a few times and I had to hand Evie a tissue at one point. It hurt to see another young driver go, and to say goodbye to him too early.

They carried the casket out into the sun to be driven away. I found Nathalie, his mother, not long after and I once again gave her my condolences as she was crying. That broke my heart, the crying mother holding on to the son she has left for support. I was also introduced to his father, who had been mostly quiet since it happened, which was equally as heartbreaking.

We went to the reception where we had food and drinks, we talked to some of the other guests and then we left quite early. Both Charles and Pierre wrote a check to Anthoine's family to help pay for the whole funeral, even though they insisted it wasn't necessary.

The day after the funeral, Charles and I had to drive another nine hours back to Monaco. I spent most of the drive sleeping or reading. At some point, Charles got bored and began blasting music, forcing me to sing along with him. To make it better, he rolled the windows down and he made my hair even more of a mess, then actually reached over to mess it up further.

When we finally got home, his mood changed as soon as he remembered the room rule. It was really driving him insane. But he had to accept it, and we spent most evenings on the sofa outside of my room, which had no rules applied to it.

I had to go back to practice and he went running with me every morning, then either walked me to the studio or drove me there. People were starting to notice how we spent more and more time together and I was slowly getting used to the idea of people talking about it on the internet. I didn't see the mean comments about it, just the ones stating the facts about how we had been seen together alone significantly more lately.