Twisted Revenge by A.ZChaudhry

Chapter 25

ALESSIO

Rain was lashing down on the whole mother earth darkening the skies and making everyone realize yet again that this was life. Totally unexpected and with nothing in our hands.

Clutching the bouquet of flowers closer to me, I slowly walked up to my late wife's grave, each step proving to be harder than the last. Each step felt like a hard stone weighing me down, stopping me from advancing further, but I had to do this. It was time and I had to finally end this all.

Her grave came into view when my chin wobbled and a thin streak of tears cascaded down my cheeks. My love was under the ground, never coming back to me.

I slowly went closer and looked at her grave, letting the reality sink in that this was my final space too. I, too, one day would be a million miles underneath this pile of dirt and no one would come to my grave and cry like I did for Julianna. No one would.

I slowly bent down and sat on the side space of her grave when I placed the flowers next to where her head would have been. The wind was whistling, the trees were dancing with the rain and it was all so silent yet so peaceful. Depressing, yes, but peaceful.

I placed my hand on some mud and gathered it in my hands when I whispered, "Hey, you."

A fresh set of tears ran down my cheeks because she always loved the way I would welcome her. This was always my way of greeting her and she would always giggle and run into my arms. I sighed and rolled the mud between my hands, letting scrapes of it fall to the floor, "I miss you, Julie. I fucking miss you so much. It's...it's hard. It's so fucking hard, my love."

I twirled the ring on my finger when I chuckled, "I still wear the ring you placed on me, marking me as yours and I loved it Julie. I loved it when we exchanged our vows, when we exchanged rings and when I kissed you. I loved the thought of you as my wife, as the horizon to my everything. I loved each and every part of it. But...."

There was a strained silence when I whispered, "But you left me. You left a man who was so deeply in love with his woman that he could do anything for her, absolutely anything. You left me and took along the only thing I could have had of you. Yes, I still have many things that belonged to you, but I wanted her. I wanted that mini us so each day that I woke up? I could see the evidence of the two of us together, right in front of me, grinning like a stupid cute little monkey that I would have loved and adored for my whole fucking life. You took her with you as well." I looked at her grave, tears blinding my vision as I whispered, "You weren't that selfish."

My chest rose and fell as I twirled my ring again and looked at it before lowering my voice, "But maybe...... you needed something that belonged to me up there with you and if that's the case?" My heart trembled as my lips shivered when I shrug my shoulders, "You had my heart, baby. You had the whole of it and I didn't want it back.

I can't say much. I still wish I could have had her with me. I would have made sure that she would have grown up with everything and would have turned out as beautiful, loving and responsible as her mother. But nature had it's own ways to show the fate painted for me on the canvas. And not gonna lie? The picture it painted was painful, an image that can never leave my side and will haunt me for all times to come.

I try, my love, I fucking try so much to move on, to get on with life and to conquer things that come along the way but, it's you that stops me. Your absence, your void, everything related to you. I don't need those canvases, those clothes, those jewellery, those perfumes....I need you. I need that part of my heart that you took. I gladly gave you my heart knowing full well that I can't function without it and you took it. You took it and went so fucking far away that no matter how hard I try to hold on to and pull back? You are gone. You are just no more and it kills me, ends me, fucking pains me.

I fucking love you, Julianna, even after death. Our vows were for till death do us part but true love never stops there. I ain't ever leaving you, I ain't ever forgetting you and I would want the both of us to be together uptill the end, no matter where it ends and when it ends. I love you. I fucking love you so much."

I gave a pause, letting me collect my breath and assemble my thoughts when I shuddered and looked at the sky, "I wish you are listening to me because I'm in pain." Tears rolled down my cheeks when I whispered, "And you always held me in pain. You always held me."

It was such a fucking beautiful day when I decided to go back to the hospital to see my dad as the more I stayed here, the more I lost my mind. I gave one last look at her grave and whispered, "I was the devil and you were my angel, Julianna. The devil and his angel.

I have fallen in love only once and am grateful to have had the opportunity to love you, hold you, kiss you and make love to you. I am entirely grateful to have had spend time with you, sleep with you, shower with you, hold you close to me and treat you not like a princess, but like a fucking queen. Yes, our time together was less but I appreciate every single moment that I spent with you. I'd rather have those few years with you that not have you at all." My voice croaked and my voice shivered because of what I was going to say next and it fucking hurt.

Love fucking hurt. Especially the one that used to burn so brightly and so fiercely that it....burnt.

"I am still in love with you and will never let go of you. You have my heart and I gladly don't want it back. Keep it. Jules....I miss you." My heart weeped and my throat gave proof, "I miss you like anything and every second of every day is so fucking tough for me, but I still fucking love you so much. I wish we could have gone a long way, I wish we both could have spent more time together, I wish....i wish you were here. I so wish you were in my arms right now. But I guess this was it for us. This was the farthest our love could burn without burning us. Although it did burn me to ashes. If....." I stood up, "if you manage to find a way to come back to me?" Rain stopped pouring when I concluded, "Please do. I would love it."

Moving the flowers closer to her, I whispered, "Happy wedding anniversary, my love. Your husband loves you but........" I bit my lip and my eyes burned with tears when my voice shook. My hands shook, my legs shook when I bent down and kissed the head of her grave, "I have to let go. I will still keep you in my heart forever as I just cannot forget you but the string that I was holding onto so tightly for you, baby?" Tear drops fell onto her grave when I whispered, "I let go of you. I love you....but I let go. Meet you on the other side." And since I never got tired of saying, I said it again, "I love you, angel."

I stepped back and approached the next grave that was of my daughter's. Not having the energy to do much, I bent low and kissed the head of her grave and whispered, "No matter where you are, I know you are as beautiful of a princess as your mother is and baba is extremely proud of you. I am so so so happy and so proud of my little girl. You are beautiful, loved and so fucking missed. Especially from the other end. Many people here miss you, my little love."

Digging my hand into my pocket and bringing out a smallll bouquet of flowers, I placed it at her head, "Take care of mama, will you? She is stubborn when she is sad and doesn't eat food. Make sure she stays hydrated. I love you, princess."

And with that, I got up. I looked at both of their graves when knowing that even still holding onto them, I let go, but not completely. I turned around and walked away, every step proving to be more difficult and heavier than the last.

I love them....but still let go of them.

But never completely.

Never completely.

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I was so fucking close to tearing up when I was editing this. Anyways, Alessio is changing slowly. I guess pain does change you....after making you go silent.

Anyways, how was the chapter? Are you enjoying the story so far?

Peace.

A.ZChaudhry

My insta: anachaudhry123

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