History (Nathan Gardner)

Our Future

"Who said I don't?" He leans against the wall looking over to me with a puzzled face.

"Well.. why would you? I mean.. you're totally passed the dirty diapers, and crying at 3am for milk..why would you want a baby in your life now?"

"And you've decided that for me, have you?" His arms are now crossed with a slight frown on his face.

"Tell me Nathan.. is that what you really want at your age?" I ask and he shrugs.

"To be honest with you, I haven't thought about it, I've never had to think about having a baby for what.. almost 17 years..I thought Susan would be my only chance at being a father..so I gave up the idea of having more a long time ago.."

I frown and put the clothes away.. before sitting on the edge of my side of the bed. I hear him shift, and the bed on his side is lowered from his weight now as he lies on his front so his head is next to me.. he looks up at me, and gives me the sweetest of smiles.

"But a baby at my age, wouldn't be so bad would it? Especially if it's ours..half me, half you.."

"You'll have everyone talking about it, doubting us, questioning the age gap.. your age.."

"Who cares? If we both love our baby then who cares what other people think?" I can't help but smile at that, the 'our baby' part.

He finally sits up and swings his legs off the bed so he's now sat beside me, letting a hand rest on my thigh..

"If it's really what you want, a family.. together.. I'd be more than happy to give it a go.." he takes my hand in his, but still resting them on my thigh..

"I think I do, I just.. I'm worried that it will ruin what we have right now.. you know? I don't want to have a baby together and then be those parents that split up because they no longer get on.. I want us to be a family, I want us to be together.."

His eyes flicker down from my eyes, to my lips.. before leaning in to place a soft and delicate kiss on them, I eagerly kiss him back, resting my hand on his face but it's over quickly as he pulls away, just a few inches, looking back up to my eyes.

"It won't ruin us, it'll only make us stronger, but I'm happy to wait until you're 100% ready that you want to do this, if you have any doubts that's when it will fail.." he leans in but only kisses my cheek.. "Just don't stress over it ok? If it happens, it happens.. and I will be right by your side, every step of the way.."

"Nathan.."

"Yes?"

"I love you.."

"I love you too pretty girl.." he raises his hand and gently pushes a strand of hair behind my ear that had fallen in front of my face..

"Let's stop worrying about our future, and enjoy the present yeah? All we have is time.."

I agree, we do, that's all we have if we're together. A baby wouldn't be so bad, it's just the people judging us, the worry of us splitting up. I'm happy he's ok with it, so that's an option we have in our future.. maybe in a few month after I finalise my career.

"So did you tell him?" My sister asks over a glass of wine that evening. It's just the two of us in the kitchen.

"Yeah.. we had a talk about it.."

"And?"

"All good.. he's never thought about having kids for a long time but he said he would have one with me.."

"That's great news! What would you want? Boy or Girl?" She asks, and it's the first time I've thought of that but.. what would I want?

"Well.. he's already for a daughter.. so maybe a boy? A mini Nathan would be cute..and a playmate for Jordan.."

"Oh my god yeah! That would be adorable.. they could be best of friends!"

"Yeah.. I guess so.."

"What's up? You don't seem happy talking about it?"

"Sorry..I just.. thought we could share these moments with Mom, I guess you'll tell her about us talking about it, it's one of the reasons I got annoyed with them, because they questioned his age, and the idea of children.. I told her I didn't want kids and now I've suddenly changed my mind? She'll have something to say about that.."

"So what? You're relationship with Nathan has got stronger, and even if they do doubt it, you're proving them both wrong..I won't tell her you're trying, but if it happens, they'll need to know.."

"I know, and I'd want them to know the baby, but it'll be hard to just forget what they said about him.."

"So you just be nice, for the baby.. not because you have forget or forgive what they did.."

"Well.. I'm not pregnant yet so we have plenty of time before I have to think of getting back in touch with them.."

"Yeah.. it's dad birthday soon, will you not send him a card?"

"I know, I probably will send him one.. just to be nice.."

"I hope you can make amends, so we can all be together again.." my sister tells me, she's never really spoken about how she feels on is falling out over Nathan, I know she didn't agree with it, but she never said anything more on it, she would only tell me what they have been up to..

"Hey!" We hear a voice from behind us.. "Can I have a glass?" It's Susan, and she joins us in the kitchen getting a glass for us to pour..

"Are you allowed?" I ask and they both chuckle at me.

"What?" I ask, clearly missing the joke.

"You, you're in parent mode already!" My sister laughs again, before grabbing the bottle to pour Susan a glass.

"I'm just checking, I don't wanna get in trouble for letting her drink wine!"

"I'm 19.. I've been drinking for a few year now!" Susan tells me, like that helps. I didn't know!

"Parent mode?" Susan quickly picks up on.. "You two.. aren't seriously planning on having a baby are you?"

"Would it be a problem?"

Great! If it is a problem, there's no way Nathan would go against his daughters feelings.

"No.. but it would be weird for me to have a brother or sister.."

"Would it? Because if it's weird for you, we don't have to?"

"It would be weird! But I'd love it.. I've always wanted to be a big sister.. even if it would be 19 years younger than me.. I could babysit!" I smile at her, thankfully she would be ok with it.

"I'm glad, I wouldn't want to go against anything that would be upsetting for you.." I tell her and she smiles, before sipping on her wine.

"I'm not gonna pretend that you and my dad going at it doesn't gross me out, but I promise being a big sis would pretty be cool.."

"So.. what did he say about that girl? Did he say who she is then?" My sister suddenly remembers and asks me, I just sigh at the thought of them together again.

"Oh.. yeah.. she's just an old college friend he said.. nothing to worry about.."

"Are you sure? They looked pretty cosy to me.."

I nod and take a big drink of my wine.. finishing the glass.

"Yeah.. that's what he said she was as, and I believe him.. I don't wanna start unnecessary drama with him.. That's who he said she is.. so let's leave it at that.."

"Who?" Susan curiously asks us both.

"Um.. she was a girl called Megan.. we saw her at the park.."

"Megan?"

"Yeah.. why?" I ask her, now the curious one as it's clear by her face that she knows exactly who Megan is. And by that I mean, was Nathan lying to me? Is she more than an old college friend? Whoever she truly is, Susan was about to tell us.

"Megan.." She frowns as she repeats her name.. "She's Dad's ex girlfriend.."