Behind His Cold Behavior ✅

PROLOGUE

COLD!

That's what he felt after he opened his eyes, the cold floor where he is lying like a lifeless person was something familiar to him.

He doesn't mind the pain he felt, he just want to lay down and stare at the ceiling, emotionless and lifeless. He want to die but life really hates him as much as he hates it, As he stares at the ceiling  memories after memories are coming back to his mind strikes like a thousand knives in his heart.

He used to be a good person for everyone and to himself, he used to be a son, a brother and a friend. But now he doesn't know anymore what's the used of his life.

Everything in his life sucks from his family, to his friends and to himself. He is asking for death but it's nowhere to be found he tried many times but he always ended waking up in this cold floor of his bedroom.

His room was now mess it's not a bedroom for anyone would like to see. Blood stains is everywhere from the mattress, blanket, pillows, carpet and the floor. His blood was there.

He doesn't care if his blood will be drained or die from the infection of his wounds. He doesn't care, really don't care. His heart is now frozen and numb especially when it comes to pain he's tolerance gets higher and higher each wounds he get.

Not even one people can understand him, why he shut himself down from the outside world and from the life it can offer.

Maybe he is just an unlucky person that's not chosen to be a children of God, because if he is chosen then he won't undergo in this kind of torture. He wants to be free from pain but he is addicted to pain. He want it all the time.

As the memories running in his mind the side of his eyes are burning as his tears fall. He can't accept his life and it's outcome. He can't continue his life even if he want, his past won't let him be happy in the present and his past won't let him have his future.

He is tired and empty for almost two years of shutting himself down and slowly killing himself was a nightmare and uncomfortable living. His night won't be the same as before where he can sleep peacefully and his day won't be the same like he can play and roam around. Because today he can't do it anymore, he can't and he won't.

He asked God for his life to be ended but then he keeps on breathing everyday. Looks like God is punishing him and hates him too. He felt empty as he inhale and empty as he exhale.

He just want death and he won't stop until he get it.

     

🌱L.N.B