It's always been you, April Kepner

getting back on track

shock to the system
season 7 ep 2

🎵A Different Age-Current Joys🎵

"And I wish I could change, but i'll probably just stay the same"

~~~~~

In the residents locker room Madelyn sits on the bench trying to ignore the sound of someone's pager going off

"Sounds big. I'm betting MVC." Jackson says

"Multiple MVC. Or an apartment fire" Alex says leaving the room

"When is this staring gonna stop?" April asks

"As soon as the novelty wears off. Just ignore them." Jackson tells her

Cristina who is sat next to Madelyn says "Owen washed my hair. And he told me to eat this grainy but bar. And he booked me into surgery this morning. He is in charge of me. I'm a bride and i'm going with it"

"The trauma guy didn't clear you" Meredith says

"Yeah but he said he'll figure that out"

Lexie turns around from her cubby and sees everyone staring at her

"Yes! I am the crazy one! I am the one who freaks out and screams at people! Like that" But she's cut off my her pager going off

"Go gawk at each other for a while" Madelyn snaps at the doctors who are still staring

Meredith turns to her sister "Are you ok?"

"Would everybody please just stop asking me if I am Ok. Ok?" Lexie says before walking out

Cristina turns to the girls "Did he clear either of you yet?"

"Nope, I haven't been to see him." Madelyn says shrugging her shoulders

Meredith gives them both a look implying he hadn't

"No. Still?" Cristina says shocked 

"I resorted to tears. I wore bad mascara so he wouldn't miss them"

"What did Derek say?" Cristina asks

"I will be avoiding him today" the blonde replies

"So you don't have to talk to him about the baby thing?"

"No!"

"Oh because you left him in the pokey?" Madelyn asks snickering at the fact her brother missed Owen and Cristina's wedding because Meredith refused to bail him out

"Yeah" Meredith says nodding her head

~~~~~

After doing scut all day, avoiding everyone and everything especially the ER Madelyn decides she's ready to talk to Dr Perkins

"I, Uh. I was scared. I was terrified. My Dad got shot, I mean my brother got shot- but so, so did my Dad. Derek has been like my father my whole life. I couldn't loose him, so I was scared. Lexie, she's my person and I almost lost her...I don't talk about other people to deflect my own problems I do it because I care more about them than I do me. I'm not exactly the best person and these people here, they're the ones who help me see the glimpse of good in myself. I talk about them because i need them in order to be me. If I didn't have Derek, there would be no one to keep me in line. If I lost Lexie, I wouldn't have someone to talk to or just sit next to, no words need to be exchanged when i'm with Lexie, she just gets it...So please just understand this is just the way I am."

There's a long pause, Dr Perkins was nodding along taking in everything the girl had just said

"Okay" he pulls out the yellow piece of paper and picks up his pen "I'll clear you. But don't and i really mean this. Don't jump in full steam. Take. Your. Time" he says handing the paper over to her

Madelyn picks up the paper and smiles at it "Yes, sir" she says walking out the room with a huge grin on her face