Empty Thoughts

Promises

Here we go again

New people

Same game

She says she cares

That she wants to help

And so I tell her that she can try

Part of me is curious

I want to know if she'll be the one

The one I can trust

Who can help

Who actually cares for once

I promise to try harder

Try to eat

Try to smile

Try not to cut

I promise I won't jump off the roof

Or out of a car

When I make them

I believe it

I think I can do it

And I'll talk to her every time

That I'm scared

Or lost

She'll hold my hand

Speak encouraging words

I'll be okay

But then everything starts again

My own little hell

And I can't keep my promises

I cut

I skip every meal of the day

I lie

She'll find out

And she'll be disappointed

She'll wonder if I trust her

I swear that I trust her

I just don't trust myself

And I make the promises again

I promise to try harder

Try to eat

Try to smile

Try not to cut

I promise I won't jump off the roof

Or out of a car

But this time

When I make them

I know that they're lies

I won't eat

I will cut

I won't be able to smile

Because I will break

And she can't save me

She's not the one

But she tries

She keeps trying

Refusing to give up

And I wonder

Will I keep my promises next time?