Empty Thoughts

Resurfacing

The faded lines reappear

The bumpy skin resurfaces

Tried and failed too many times

No longer wanting to be seen

I slip to the back of the class

Not standing at the center barre

Not showing off archy feet

Or perfect pirouettes

Not wanting to be noticed

Hiding the dark rings under my eyes

With makeup

Hiding the loss in weight

With big sweatshirts

Hiding fear

With a smile

It all starts again

I push

I fight

I stand strong

Refuse to let myself be this way

But I can feel it

The evil thoughts flying into my head

My sanity skipping off again

As the faded lines reappear

The bumpy skin resurfaces

Reappearing

Resurfacing

Over

And over

And over again