Lost at Sea || Finnick Odair x OC (DISCONTINUED)

Thirty-Six: yikesburg

FINNICK

°•. ✿ .•°

"Girl, you are going to shit your pants and kill your sister when I tell you this." Johanna says. The phone is on speaker, and the sentence makes me laugh loudly. We're still in the Capitol, but it's super late at night, so I guess Johanna didn't want to just come up and visit us.

"Well, my sister is already dead... but, do tell!" Daphne smiles. I cackle again and nearly drop my bagel.

"Oh my God, mine too! Twinsies!"

"AAAAHHH!"

"AAAAHHH!" Johanna clears her throat. "Okay, so you remember that super weird guy named Marcus that kept trying to hit on me?"

I pause. "The one with the droopy chin?"

"Yeah, that's the one." Johanna says. "Okay, remember how he kept telling me how stunning and marvelous I was, and I was like, acting all cute and stuff while insulting him?"

"Yes, of course." Daphne nods as she starts taking off her shirt. I stare, watching her put on a different one, even leaning over to get a better view, but she cuts me a sharp glare as she slips on the new one, completely destroying the beautiful view. It's like splattering red paint on a perfectly fine and classic painting!

"Okay." Johanna is trying to contain her giggle. "Remember how I started learning how to fight with Blight?"

I drop my jaw. "You didn't."

"Johanna!" Daphne laughs.

"Oh, but that's just the tip of the yikesburg!" Johanna shouts.

I pause. "Did you just-"

"Well, then his dad comes out-"

"The super old guy with the micropenis?" Daphne laughs. "Please, what could he do?"

I stare at her. "How do you know that he has a micropenis?"

Johanna answers for me. "You know how Capitol people wear really tight pants?"

"Ew!" I gag as I shove my bagel in my mouth. I stand right by the phone, pretending I'm talking to a human Johanna and not Johanna-through-the-phone. "Okay, anyways. His dad comes out?"

"Right!" I can practically imagine her shaking her head to get back on track. "So, he starts telling me to lay off his son, yada-yada, and he starts pulling me off of Marcus, 'cause, y'know, I'm pummeling the guy, as one does."

"As one does." Daphne and I agree.

"Well, then his daughter comes out-"

Daphne juts in. "The super hot one with the huge boobs?"

"Yes, that's the one." Johanna clarifies. "And she starts telling him to lay off me, seeing as I am a tiny little woman and he's the size of a redwood. Anyways, he lets me go or whatever, and takes his stupid droopy son inside, and she stays with me to make sure I'm okay or whatever. And the whole time, she's wearing this super skimpy top, so I can totally see her tits, as one does."