You were my father
But I never saw you as such
I saw you as my worst fear
my worst nightmare
Every now and there
You would treat me like your daughter
You made me feel seen, loved and cared for in that moment
Then the next
You become this person I didn't even recognize anymore
I couldn't do anything with feeling the angry radiated off of you
The way you looked disgust by me
The way you would raise your voice if I asked a question
The way I loved you because you were still my father
I wanted to hate you
But I couldn't which made me hate myself for loving you
Made me feel guilty for loving you
I loved you dad
But now I could care less about you
