16. i can't help being myself

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some might say I've changed

and that couldn't be more true

i don't know if you will like it

but i think i never really needed

to be like liked by you


they call the things cringe

when they lack the spunk they see

and if this courage is labelled as cringe

maybe that's all i want to be


and the fear of looking stupid

have long stopped holding me back

I'm doing everything i couldn't envisage

I'm in love in all my cracks


I'm giving myself the liberty

the be the everything i want

and i wonder why do i keep myself concealed

when i have million stars to flaunt


I've always wanted to be someone

when i could ethereally be me all this while

now that I'm finally doing it

you can see the constellation in my eyes


I've feared being myself

or maybe their judgements and opinions

but i cant help being myself

empty faces can never make me bow to their dominion 


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As I approached the canteen, he caught sight of me and rose to his feet, grinning from ear to ear. I tried to quell the fluttering in my stomach and conceal the blush that crept up my anemic cheeks as I made my way towards him.

"You really saved me back there," he said. "I thought I might know a few answers, but I was completely lost. Thank you"

I smiled, feeling a sense of satisfaction at having been able to help him. "The whole class was staring at us when you called out my name so loudly," I replied, my tone serious but relieved. "We could have gotten into trouble if anyone had told the teacher."

He scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Sorry about that," he said. "It won't happen again. Next time, I'll just throw something at you." He spoke with a newfound confidence.

We heard the sound of the main entrance opening and turned to see Danish walking out. "There won't be a next time," I said firmly.

"We'll see about that," he replied, a playful smirk on his lips as he made his way towards Danish.

In my mind, I reaffirmed my resolve. Yes, there would not be a next time.

Soon, Dhriti and Saara emerged from the building, chatting animatedly. Dhriti was beaming, pleased with how her test had gone. Saara, on the other hand, was fuming. She had left one question until the end and then forgotten to attempt it.

Dhriti suggested we all get some ice cream to lift Saara's spirits. As we chatted and savored our ice-cream bar, Dhriti and Saara eventually had to leave to catch their vans.

I made my way to the highway, a short five-minute walk away, to catch the bus. The August winds caressed my face as I smiled to myself, replaying the events of the anxious , a little tiring yet fun-filled day in my mind.

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