where will destiny take us?

☆ 3 ☆

I slammed my lunchbox down on the table my friends are occupying, taking the seat they reserved for me.

"Finally, dumating ka na rin." Ethan's face gleamed when he saw me. The mood of the table uplifted and they all turned to face me. "So, what—"

"Don't fucking talk to me, Ethan." Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin at napahawak siya sa balikat ni Narda. "This is your fault."

I looked down on my food, not feeling the drive to eat but the voice inside me telling me to eat was stronger. Kinuha ko yung sandwich at kumagat. Natahimik naman ang mga kaibigan ko. Panandalian nga lang.

"So why'd you become Ivan's note-taker?" Mary asked, really curious.

Napabuntong hininga ako at sinagot siya. "The car yesterday? That's the dean's car."

Napanganga si Carl, stopping on eating his meal. "Out of all the cars in the parking lot?"

"Yes. So fucking lucky of me, right, Ethan?" I faced Ethan with a deadpan face.

He pouted. "Ikaw 'yung nagbato eh. 'Di naman ako."

Narda covered his face with her hand. I'm thankful kasi baka mabato ko sa kanya 'yung sandwich ko kung nagkataon.

"The dean assigned you to that job?" Narda asked.

"Yeah." Still not feeling my appetite, I put down my food.

"Ta's nilipat ka sa section B para d'on?"

"Obviously."

"Then why not quit?" asked Carl. "I heard naman na may umaayaw kahit one week pa lang."

"I can't." I shook my head, taking a heavy breath through my nose. "The dean said that if he fails the sem, I'll repeat the year like him."

"Really?" They asked in unison.

"Yes, really. How else is he gonna keep me on that job?"

Isinandal ko ang likod sa upuan ko. I stared at my food but the will to eat still hasn't arrived. All I could do is swallow while my mind is killing me.

If I don't eat, I'll die.

I let out another exhale, picking my sandwich. Tsaka ko napansin na hindi lang pala ako ang nakamasid sa sarili ko. Maybe the appetite is being shooed away by people who walk by our table, eyes seeking me.

"Why are people looking at me?" I asked while I forced myself to eat.

"'Cause marami nang may alam," answered Mary.

"Ng ano?"