where will destiny take us?

afterstory 1

"Do you know why I grew my hair this long?"

I stared at Ivan's reflection on the mirror as he set the electric shaver, making sure it works. He looked at my reflection over the shaver.

"Why?" he asked.

"So that when I get cancer again, I can have a wig of my own hair." I moved my gaze to my face in the mirror, smiling. "Now it's here."

Ivan inhaled sharply. He placed the shaver on the sink counter. Mula sa aking likod ay niyakap niya ako at pinatong ang kanyang ulo sa aking balikat.

He was extra warm today, probably because of my fever. I held his hand tightly. Sumandal ako sa kanya at pinikit ang aking mata tsaka idinikit ang gilid ng aking ulo sa kanya na nakapatong sa aking balikat.

"I'm so sorry, babe," he said on my neck, voice muffled.

Hinigpitan ko ang hawak sa kanyang kamay. "It's alright. I'm already prepared."

Lumayo siya sa aming yakap at tumayo ng tuwid sa aking likuran. Hinawakan niya ang magkabilang gilid ng akong mukha at marahan akong tiningala sa kanya. Napangiti ako nang makita ang mukha niyang baliktad sa aking paningin.

His eyes were moist. They were full of emotions but they never drowned me. Instead, it hugged me coolly, easing the pain all over my body because of my fever.

Above me, he smiled. He then leaned down and kissed my forehead. "I'm so proud of you."

I closed my eyes to the sensation of his warm lips that spread across my body, making my heart calm in my chest. Tears started rolling down the sides of my eyes. 

"Thank you."

Ivan wiped my tears, leaving streaks of wetness on my face. When I faced myself again in the mirror, I stared at my own eyes. The eyes of a woman filled with equal hope and despair.

No matter how much I smile, the feelings of uncertainty won't wash away like a small, annoying pebble in my shoe. But I still kept my smile.

It's called "uncertainty" for a reason. A lot of things can happen. And along with the bad things are the good ones. Each of the bad endings I pictured in my head could happen in equal probability with the good endings. Like a coin with two sides. All I have to do is wait for it to land and see my fate.

Inayos na ni Ivan ang shaver. Sinuklay ko naman ang mahaba kong buhok na abot na sa aking mga hita. Dahil sa pag-aalaga ko sa buhok ko ng maraming taon, my hair was still healthy.

The long strands of my dark brown hair frames my face, highlighting my features. Even after brushing it, soft waves remained. The length isn't ideal for playing tennis but despite that, I made it work because I love this hair and I wouldn't trade it for anything else.