RIGHT

Chapter 37

A voice called my name, but that wasn't the voice I yearned to hear, I yearned to hear the voice of the individual, whom I left behind with a broken heart, who had left me with a broken heart.

"Come on, I will drop you." Holden gently led me to the car which carried us here. While he drove the car, I sat with grim silence, and tears burning at the edge of my eyes.

I wished I could do something to stop thinking about him, but there wasn't anything that didn't remind me of him, he was everywhere, in every breath I took, in my beating heart, in the strangers that passed by me, in the air, in the scenery, his essence was sprinkle in the entire universe.

Holden's car halted in front of my dorm building while my thoughts were still ragging and exploding.

"Do you want me to come in?" He asked, softly. There was a long pause, filled with trepidation.

"Thank you, Holden, but I want to be alone," I quietly answered, he looked at me, and something ominous flashed in his eyes. For few moments, I quietly sat on the seat inside the car.

"I am here for you," he said, breaking the silence. I nodded.

Unexpectedly, he was leaning in, against my face. I wasn't ignorant of the fact that he was going to kiss me, I close my eyes, and face of Aiden flashed.

Aiden.

In an instant, my hands pushed away Holden harshly, thick and clouded emotion settled inside my heart, learning about actuality. Holden was going to kiss me when all I certainly only longed for was Aiden's kisses. Hurt flickered on his face, however, I didn't feel any contrition when I pulled back, rather there was a relief that in this weakness of the moment, there could happen the mistake of a lifetime.

"I am sorry, I shouldn't have done that," Holden apologized, with utmost sincerity, yet my mind was somewhere else more specified on someone. With an abrupt move, I opened the car door without looking at him. I didn't want more baggage for tonight, I had already enough.

"Thank you for dropping, Holden."

"Emerald!" He called, appearing frantic, yet my weak limbs vigorously covered the distance to the room.

"Goodbye Holden."

When I reached the room, I was greeted with quiet and heavy stillness but not heavier than my heart. The room was so dark not a single outline of furniture could be traced. Lumbering, I reached my room and fell to the floor. A tear fell and soon more followed.

You will never understand it because you have never been to love.

Recollection of Lucy's words flashed in front of my eyes. That day her words seem like an empty shell but this very day it has a profound definition.

I knew what I had to do, my quivering hand removed the phone from the pocket of my jeans, and even with a more convulsive breath, I dialed the number of the person to whom I had to apologize. The ring continued to ring and finally, on the last phase the person answered.

"Hello?" A sleepy voice reached my ears through the phone. The guilt of waking her in the middle of the night surged, however, the guilt of not understanding her before was more prominent.

" L-Lucy I am sorry, so sorry..." My voice choked and it was hard to breathe with every passing word through my mouth. A creak was heard like when you suddenly rose from the bed.

"Emerald? Are you okay? Why are apologizing? Are you crying? What is happening? Where are you?" She started launching worry-stricken questions. I endeavored to speak and answer her questions but no voice could discard from my mouth, it felt like hands are strangling my neck. I felt so helpless. More tears flooded without my control; I was out of control.