Sweet.
j.bellingham
Laura never hated anyone as much as she hated herself,
But Jude couldn't help but see the beauty in every corner of her soul.
IN WHICH a boy desperately loves a girl that can't see him.
TW : This book contains a lot of talk a...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Laura rubbed the tears off of her chucks cheeks, sniffing and biting her lips, trying not to burst in tears for the fourth time.
She still felt the knife that her mom's words were, sharp and hard strongly brushing her skin.
It had been two days laura hadn't eaten anything because everytime she'd step in her kitchen, she'd feel the hard look of her mother making her want to throw up her empty stomach out.
When Jude invented her over she wasn't expecting him to have cook literally two different meals because 'i wasn't sure if you were more in a pasta or fish and chips mood so I just did both'.
That's where the tears went all out and Laura had no more control over them. Jude rushed to take her in his arms asking worryingly what was going on. He could put up all the act he wanted, he knew deep down who was the only one that could hurt his love this much.
It was like if everyday God gave him more reasons to despise this woman.
But today was different. Laura couldn't stop crying even after a good thirty minutes and Jude deduced that she must have kept all of it inside and she needed to let it all out now because it became too much.
So they sat there, her loudly crying while his heart drowned silently at the sight.
That's where Jude's heart hurt the most. Right there.
But now,
Now that he was driving faster that he ever did, now that the tears were blurring his vision making the road almost invisible, now that all his text were left unread. Now that was the kind of pain he wish he would never feel.
Jude parked and did not really have the time to check before rushing to his Laura's apartment.
While struggling to open the door with his key because of his shaky hands, all he could think about was that his girl was okay, that she was fine, that he was just paranoid and she'd smile at him telling him 'I swear i'm okay, but now that you're here let's just watch a movie'. He'd say yes and they'd snuggle on her couch watching karate kid.
But when the door opened, Jude's eyes fell on Laura's body laying on her couch. Sleeping. The kind of sleeping so peaceful it made her look almost gone.
Jude felt his heart tumble down.
His hand grabbing her face. Laura use to love how her name sounded in Jude's mouth. It was such an awful word in her mom's, it sounded like an insult. But him, he made everything he touched looked beautiful. Everything he'd say was a poem. And her name sounded like the most beautiful lyrics ever written.
But those 'Laura' were cries for help and if the young woman could hear the sob in his voice, she'd hate herself for it.
Putting his hand on the top of her throat, searching for the pulse of this heart he loved so dearly, but nothing. No faint beating. Not an ounce of life.
Jude fell to his knees, or was he already there ? His hands still on his beloved's face.
How pretty could a human be ?
He could see the dried tears on her face but the blood of the massacre she had just commit in his heart stopped him from thinking about anything else but the vivid pain in his chest.
Resting his face on the couch, sobbing like a little child, and praying like he used to a when he was still a kid.
'Please God, Please'
When the sobs calmed down, emptiness took its place.
Did that mean he would never see her eyes ? He would never feel her lips on his cheeks ? He would never smell her perfume ?
Did that mean he'll never get the chance to tell her he loved her truly ? He'll never get the chance to feel her lips on his ? He'll never get the chance to love her properly, the way she deserved it ?
That was all a nightmare.
It had to be.
It couldn't be real.
That was the worst nightmare he had ever done.
He needed to wake up.
Now.
He needed to feel her arms going through his hair, her voice whispering calming words.
He needed her because life was so terrifying without Laura by his side.
Jude thought about her hand in his hair, trying to calm his breath.
Her hand in his air.
It almost felt real.
Wait.
Her eyes, her hands, her smell.
It was real.
Jude gasped, or let out a noise that looked more like a child trying to breathe through his cries.
God listened to him.
"I though you" a sob cut him through his speech "I thought you were-"
"I know. I'm here." Laura took his body weakened by the tears in her embrace. "I'm here." She whispered calmly.
His tears pained her but she took it in because she was the cause. She let her hand go through his hair and waited for his breath go on the same rhythm as her's.
It almost look like he was sleeping now, but Laura could still hear him sniffing and feel the tears falling on her bare skin.
Jude looked up to meet her eyes he thought he'd never see again, she was tearing up as well.
They were full of sadness, not the type her mom used to create, it was a new kind, one he hated as well.
"I thought I lost you." Laura said.
"I'm here." He sweared, grabbing her hand and holding it like a raft on a deserted ocean. "I've always been." Jude swallowed but his throat was still hurting. "I'm sorry I wasn't here when you called."
"I'm not mad at you."
"Really ?"
She nodded and he sighed.
"I'm sorry I tried to-"
"I'm not mat at you." He said, looking at all of her traits precisely to print them and have them forever in his mind. So he'd never forget her angelic face. "I'm glad you stayed"
"I couldn't leave you. You wouldn't have survived a second without me." She said slightly smiling, brightening his heart with the light it needed.
