Summers at The Burrow - Fred Weasley

Chapter Forty-one - Egypt

Summer had often been a time of peace and relaxation where i didn't have to worry about my education or my personal care because i had Mrs. Weasley to care for me. i use past tense because everything has changed. im getting older now and the world is getting darker. the people around me are evolving and some of them are even dying. even the twins have asked why i am no longer the happy energetic person i used to be.

my soul had darkened as if someone had turned a light off and burned the wire so i could not turn the switch back on. i could pretend to be happy but everyone believed it. i really wish they didn't believe my mask. 

the only one who has ever been able to see through it is Fred but he never talks to me about it. he never even wants to bring up anything that has to do with my past. I've told him its painful to talk about but sometimes you have to let the pain get to you in order to fight back and i needed him to open the door for me. 

The others have noticed how distant i have become and have tried to pull me back in but i cant say it to them because they know nothing. it was three in the morning again. insomnia was normal now. ever since the day i arrived back at the Burrow i was seeing shadows of the monster inside of me dancing on the ceiling and it was mesmerizing and terrifying at the same time. the circles around my eyes had turned a deep shade of purple and the Weasley's could tell i was getting no sleep but i continued to blow any mention of it off and hide it with makeup. 

we were a few weeks into summer holiday now and i was hurrying out the door with my broomstick when Fred caught my arm.

"you and me. in the orchard. alone. were talking." he said sternly as he continued to hold my arm moving away from the house as if i was not already headed in that direction.

"unhand me!" i shouted as his grip tightened.

"no. your upset and an insomniac and its making me upset and an insomniac; so, were going to talk about it." he said though it was not in a harsh tone. i could hear the concern and hurt in his voice and it made tears well up in my eyes as we arrived in the orchard and he gently let go of my arm. his grip did not hurt but i still rubbed my arm as he released me.

"i can't just start talking; you have to ask." i said with my head down as i sat down on my floating broomstick with my feet still brushing the ground.

"why are you not sleeping?" he asked as he sat next to me on my broom.

"i don't feel the same as i used to. this world we live in, its mesmerizing but it hurts. i try to help save people and yet i watch people die and get blamed for it and used for press when im only trying to keep myself alive. its gotten to the point where i don't even know if i want to be alive anymore." i explained.

"Chloe, why did you not tell me?" he asked as he wrapped an arm around me wiping my tears away with his hand.

"I've been waiting for you to ask because i just cant start talking about it. i scare myself into thinking i cant do it. i just needed you to talk about it. i just needed you." i said sliding off the broom and moving closer to Fred as i hugged him tightly. he had his arms wrapped around my waist with one hand rubbing my back as i stood between his legs so that he could hold me closer. my face was nuzzled in the crook of his neck as i cried.

"Chloe, i need you to know that you can talk to me whenever you need to. i will drop everything if you need me even if its someone's ashes in a porcelain jar." he said making me start to laugh as i pulled away.

"thank you." i said. he still had his hands resting on my waist and i had my hands on his shoulders. it had been a long time since i had looked at Fred's face this close and i had to admit. he had grown a lot in the last few months. we all had. we had gone from looking like young children to really looking like teenagers and each of us even Ron and Ginny looked much older than we did before.