Summers at The Burrow - Fred Weasley

Chapter Seventy - Not Harder Than My Life

i scrambled to my feet holding my wand out like a sword as my eyes darted around. everyone looked wildly concerned as i stood there with fury in my eyes and written across my face. I tended to overreact when faced with grief.

I'm bad at putting words to my thoughts in situations like this and I don't even think I'm sane right now. the last bit of calm left me and I tucked my wand away carefully. everyone looked at me like I was a ticking bomb. I ran out of the hall into the family room and flipped the couch over. thankfully there was no one on it or flipping it would have been slightly more difficult.

there was an old chair that had no significance to the family and I picked it up by the back slamming it into the door frame that led to the dinning room. the chair split and much of it was splintered and being held together by nothing but rusty nails. the door frame was dented and the wood was split a little, exposing the raw gray wood beneath the dark finish.

I tore books off of the shelves built into the walls and launched them at old picture frames at the walls knocking them down or otherwise causing them to swing and rattle so much that the moving figures in the frame even began to get shaken up and startled.

i tried to pick up one of the fractured legs of the old chair I broke but when I did my finger got caught on a particularly sharp piece of the wood and a sharp pain erupted from the tip of my finger as I pulled away. a small drop of blood was forming quickly over the injury but I just wiped it on my pants and continued on.

the brief pause I did take gave Remus the change to get close to me to see if he could stop me but he was mistaken. I reached to the mantel wrapping my hand around a vase. I brought it down in front of me causing It to shatter in between us. he was blocked from getting to me.

"Chloe, please! Enough of this!" Mrs. Weasley tried to call out to me.

"Bellatrix killed my father. His body is gone. it's disappeared. we can't even have a proper funeral for him. I tried to kill her, Mrs. Weasley. I was so close. So close! one bore blow and I could have done it but Remus came in and stopped me from killing her by bringing me here! everything in here is a reminder of the father I once had! He's dead! I'm alone, with no parents, and all the family I have left are trying to kill the people I care about! I don't think I've ever truly felt safe anywhere! there's maybe one place where I have felt at home and He's not even here!"

"is she talking about Fred, or Sirius?" Tonks asked Moody in a low voice.

"She's just being dramatic." he replied.

"Shut up!" I shouted at the top of my lungs as I fell to my knees. I could feel the sharp vase through my pants but I wasn't harmed. Remus pulled me to my feet with the help of Kingsley and they sat me on an armchair then flipped the couch back to it's normal state and sat down on it facing me.

"send for the twins, Arthur." Mrs. Weasley instructed her husband and he nodded curtly before hurrying off into a different room. I could hear and see everything that was going on but my body was fighting my urges to war with the universe. it was taking all my might and strength to keep myself still in a chair and the others could see it by the way I was focusing on one small button on the opposing armchair. my knuckles were white with anger and I was clenching the arm rests but at least I was still and quiet.

Thirty minutes passed and Fred and George came barging through the front door of number twelve Grimauld Place. Fred rushed into the room i was in and when i saw him i finally broke down. seeing Fred was the straw that broke the camels back.

he hurried over to me and knelt in front of me resting a hand on my leg with a concerned look on his face.

"What happened?" he asked gently.

"Bellatrix killed my father and his body is gone." i said. Hot tears were rolling down my cheeks faster than i could wipe them away. i so badly wanted to let out a gut wrenching sob but my muscles tightened and i couldn't.

"Chloe-"

"No," i said in a choked voice as i finally let out a sob. i couldn't get any words out and i groaned in frustration as i balled myself up in the chair and hid myself as best i could.

Fred grabbed me gently and pulled me off the chair into his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his torso. he wrapped his arms around my waist holding me closely to his chest. our heads were nuzzled in each other's necks and Fred was regulating his breath in a way that would hopefully guide me to regulate my own breath to a calmer state.

"did you try to kill her?" he asked me quietly.

I nodded and felt his hand rest on my head to stop me from nodding so harshly. "I had her under me. i could have done it but Remus took me away."

"your mad that he didn't let you finish her?" he asked.

"yeah." i replied.

"He should have let you. you're strong enough to take on someone like her. you've fought off worse than the killing curse. it's a piece of cake for you." he said.

i laughed. not even i expected it. i appreciated Fred making light of the situation because it helped the situation take longer to sink in.

"I love you, Fred." i whispered so that only he could hear.

"I love you too, Chloe. I'm so glad you're alive, you have no idea." he replied and i tightened my arms around him. if we could have gotten any closer to one another, we just did. Fred is my rock. he supports me when I'm drowning and it is really hard to swim through my life without almost drowning a few times. I might have a really hard life but he always knows the right thing to say to me to help me. His life is not harder than my life but he makes my trials his trials too so that we can go through them together. a partner is the best thing i could have ever received in this life and thankfully i have the most perfect one all to myself.

Now i just have to face it.