This is the story of Thomas Barrow.
Thomas Barrow has been working as the first footman at Downton Abbey for years. He's always been careful to keep his personal life hidden from the prying eyes of the other staff members and the Crawley family. Bu...
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The Abbey was abuzz with the elegance and charm that had become synonymous with the Crawley family. As Thomas, along with Mr. Carson and Andy, attended to the needs of the family, the aroma of the sumptuous meal permeated the air. But as the tantalising scent filled his nostrils, an unusual sensation overcame Thomas, causing his stomach to churn and twist.
Barely managing to maintain his composure, Thomas excused himself politely from the dining room, his face betraying the discomfort he felt. With determined steps, he hurried towards the servants' kitchen, seeking refuge from the overwhelming smells that threatened to engulf him. The sound of clinking silverware and hushed conversations from the dining room faded away as he made his way through the labyrinthine corridors.
Finally reaching the servants' entrance, Thomas flung open the heavy door, the cool evening air washing over him, providing a momentary respite from the turmoil within. He staggered into the courtyard, seeking solace amidst the familiar surroundings that had witnessed his triumphs and trials over the years.
Thomas braced himself against the onslaught of nausea. He clutched his abdomen, willing the sickness to subside. With each breath, he fought against the urge to retch as he stared out into the night. The cool evening air embraced him, providing a much-needed respite from the stifling ambiance inside he braced himself against the nearest wall, his face contorted with discomfort.
And then, it happened—his body convulsed, and his stomach revolted against him. Bitter bile surged up his throat, overwhelming him with its force. He retched, heaved, and expelled the contents of his churning stomach onto the cobblestone courtyard. Each retch was accompanied by a wave of discomfort.
Tears welled up in his eyes, a mixture of physical pain and the overwhelming emotional burden he carried. As he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, a deep sense of frustration washed over him. How could he allow himself to be so vulnerable, so utterly defeated by a mere smell?
Taking deep breaths, Thomas willed himself to steady his trembling limbs. He glanced around the empty courtyard, grateful for the solitude it offered. The stars sparkled overhead, reminding him of the vastness of the universe and the insignificance of his momentary weakness.
After a few minutes, Thomas straightened his jacket, composed his features, and resolved to reenter the grand manor. Though he yearned for the solace of solitude, duty called him back to the dining room. With newfound determination, he pulled open the back door, ready to face the challenges that awaited him.
As he reentered the servants' kitchen, he caught sight of his reflection in a polished copper pot hanging on the wall. The man staring back at him bore the weight of his struggles, but his eyes reflected a glimmer of resilience—a spark that had been temporarily dimmed but not extinguished.
~
Later that night once in his room, with gentle hands, he helped Ellie get ready for bed, guiding her through the motions of changing into her cozy nightgown. Once she was settled in her bed, clutching her beloved worn bunny teddy bear, Thomas kissed her forehead and wished her goodnight.
Turning on his heel, Thomas took the couple of steps towards his own bed, feeling a sense of weariness settle upon him. He discarded his suit and slipped into his pyjamas, preparing for a night of rest. The weight of his pregnancy, an extraordinary circumstance that he had come to accept, made finding a comfortable position increasingly difficult. Nevertheless, he persevered, determined to find a posture that would grant him a few hours of uninterrupted sleep.
Eventually, Thomas settled on lying on his left side, propping a pillow gently under his burgeoning belly. As he lay there, he could feel the baby within him move and wriggle, a reassuring sign of life. Tenderly, he rubbed his belly, hoping to soothe the restless little one and encourage it to settle down for the night. The connection he felt to this child, whom he carried and would soon bring into the world, filled him with a mixture of excitement, anticipation, and a touch of trepidation.
In the dimly lit room, the flickering candle on his bedside table cast a soft, warm glow. Its gentle dance with the shadows provided a sense of serenity and calmness. Thomas closed his eyes, allowing the weariness of the day to wash over him. The love he felt for his children, both Ellie and the one yet to be born, enveloped him like a protective shield.
As he blew out the candle, darkness descended upon the room, wrapping Thomas in a cocoon of silence and tranquility. The rhythmic sound of his own breathing and the subtle movements of his unborn child filled the air, creating a soothing lullaby. Contentment washed over him, and soon, Thomas drifted into a peaceful slumber, his dreams filled with visions of a future filled with love, acceptance, and endless possibilities.
