I fell in love with my bully ( trigger warning selfharm)

019

Pov: Tessa

I wake up and don't see Hardin next to me. I get dressed and walk downstairs. " hey mom did you see Hardin" I walk into the kitchen where my mom is making some tea . " yeah he left early he didn't say why" I see my mom looking at me " did he take his car" I walk towards the front door and open it. I didn't see his car so I have to take my bike. I walk back to te kitchen and take my bag. " thanks mom" I kiss  her cheek. " be careful sweetheart " I smile at my mom and walk to the front door and get outside and close the door. I take my phone and message Hardin.

Me: Hardin where are you ?
Me: I'm worried.
Me: Hardin please answer.

No response I step on my bike and drive everywhere where Hardin could be. Finally I came at an restaurant and see his car standing in the parking lot. I walk towards it and feel it's still warm so it means he is not here for so long. I walk inside and see Steph and Molly sitting at an table. " hey Tess" I see Steph waving at me to sit next to her . " hey" I sit down next to her and look around . " hey  fatty did you find Hardin already  " I hear Molly laughing at me . I  don't say anything " he will be here soon" I look at Steph and I see a worried look on her face " why did he leave" I asked her. " you will found out ugly girl" I feel Molly slapping my arm. Not hard way but mean way . I see Hardin walking towards us with Jace. Why would he he knows Jace is a bully of mine and he is still with them.

" Tess what are you doing here" I see hardin looking at me with sad eyes. " you were gone this morning and didn't answer your phone " I look at him trying to figure out what is going on. " don't you think this is a little bit to much" I look at her confused " what do you mean". " molly shut up" I look at Hardin his eyes are full of guilt but why what is he hiding . " come on Hardin this game is going to far". " what game" I turn around to face Hardin. " it's nothing Tess really come with Me" I feel him taking my hand but I push him away. " no hardin what is going on what is she talking about" with tears in her eyes I look at him . " did you really think he would fall in love with a fat and ugly girl like you you're just a bet Tessa right Hardin" I look at hardin with tears in my eyes and cry  " I'm just a bet hardin". " it's not like that Tess " I feel him taking hmy hands. I pull my hand back and hear Molly say " you are really good in this Hardin wait I have a video so you can see I'm not lying".

I see Molly take her phone and show me the video that they planned this all along. " and you" I  turn to face Steph. " you are supposed to be my best friend and you knew and you didn't tell anything" I feel myself getting angrier. " I'm sorry" i shake my head knowing she's not sorry about it . " it's a little bit to late to say sorry" I stand up and walk outside. I feel Hardin grabbing my wrist " Tess please listen" I turn around to face him . " no Hardin I knew this was to prefect I shouldn't have trusted you" I feel the tears running down my cheeks " Tess" . " no Tess Hardin you took away something that wasn't yours Hardin you took my virginity and I regret de decision that I made" I shake my head how could I be so stupid to believe he would actually care.

" I thought there was nothing that could change your mind the way you feel about me" I look at Hardin and see tears in his eyes. " then I guess we are both liars" I walk away from him. I little bit of hope I thought that he would come after me, but he didn't he turned around and got inside again. My heart could cry round now but I have to be strong this time I walk towards our favorite spot the lake I sit down and start to think what I should do. I'm sick of people who are trying to ruin me. I stand up and walk towards home. I know Hardin would be here because he had nowhere to go. I open the front door and walk inside. Of course my mom is working right now. I take my phone and call school to say that I'm feeling sick.

I walk upstairs and see Hardin clothes and shake my head. I take my suitcase and put in some clothes and a toothbrush. I have to leave foe a while. I feel broken I always felt broken but this is something different. I know I shouldn't do this but the pain is to much. I take the blade and put it into my skin and cut my self a few time. I wrapped bandage around it and take a paper and a pen.

Hey Hardin

If you read this that means that I'm gone.
Please do not come find me I need some space
You broke me again I really thought you were different but I guess it wasn't meant to be

Tessa

I walk down stairs and write a note for my mom that I will sleep a couple days at a friends house. And if she wants to know she should ask Hardin. I take my phone and call Landon. Landon is Amy other best friend who lives farther away from me because we met on the internet. " hey Tess how are you" I hear Landon say at the other end of the phone . " it's a long story can I come to you" . " yeah of course " I smile a bit . " I will see you soon" I hang  up the phone and open Hardin message and block him. I can't do this not now. I take my bag and walk towards the front door and close it. When I arrive at the bus station. I step into the bus and drive towards the airport.

When I arrived I walk towards my flight and get in to the plain and sit down. I will miss you even when you are hurting me.....

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Written on 22-07-2023
Rewritten on 30-10-2023