I fell in love with my bully ( trigger warning selfharm)

025

Pov: Hardin

When my dad called I was a little bit scared because I know how far he would go. I get of the barstool and give the bartender the money for the drinks. I walk towards my car and unlock it. I start the car and drive towards highway. And of course I drive into a traffic jam. " shit" I slam on my steering wheel. I shake my head and take my phone and look at the picture of me and Tessa. I smile and put the phone down. After 30 minutes the traffic is finally gone and I drive towards the frat house. I park my car and get inside and sit down on the couch. I feel my phone buzzing. I take my phone and see Tessa has posted something.

I open Instagram and feel my jaw dropping . ( see picture above ). She looks amazing I have never saw her this was. I scroll trough her Instagram and stop at a post with her an a guy who I don't know she's smiling happy with him. Who the fuck is he. I shouldn't be jealous because it was mine own fault that I lost her. I start to get angry and close Instagram and put down my phone. I walk towards the kitchen and open the fridge. Of course no food I sigh and walk towards the couch again and sit down. I take my cigarettes and place one into my mouth and light it on.

Flashback.
" Hardin can you promise me something " I feel Tessa  holding my face. " yeah anything love" I smile at her. " can you promise me that you will stop smoking and drinking It would me the world for me and your mom " I smile lightly " I promise" I take my cigarettes and throw them into the trash can. " I love you Hardin Scott" " I love you Tessa young" I place my lips on hers.
End flashback

I promised her that I would quite smoking and drinking but I just can't do it I need to stop feeling. I feel zed sitting next to me. " hey sorry about what I said" he gives me a cup with vodka. " it's fine"  I put the cup on my mouth and swallow it all. " I never wanted to bully her you know" I hear zed say lighting up a joint. " you want some" he hands me the joint. I take the joint and put it into my mouth and take a blow. I give it back to zed " then why did you do it". I take the bottle of vodka that is standing on the table and put it to my mouth and drink it.

" I guess because of moly" he takes the bottle from me and drink it too. " what did she do or say that you are bullying her" I was  a little bit angry and take the bottle back and drink it empty. " I don't know Hardin" he puts out the joint. " so you did it for no reason" I hear my voice getting angrier. " I guess yeah but I don't want it anymore at the party a couple weeks ago she was really cool " I smile a little " yeah I never knew she would actually drink it". " I know right" I hear zed laughing.

" you coming to the party tonight scott " he face me. " I don't know " I  take a second cigarette and light it on. " come on scott it will be fun " he takes a cigarette too.  " fine " I finally say after a couple seconds. " yes let's go then" he stands up from the couch. " what now what's the Time " I ask at him. " it's almost 22:00 pm " I shake my head and laugh. " I forgot the time " I shake my head. " well let's go ". I stand up and walk behind zed towards his car and get in. We always take my car but this time zed say that we can take his car because we need to get someone.

" who need we to pick up" I look at him from the side. " my girlfriend " he looks at me with a big smile. " since we do you have a girlfriend " " and since when don't you have one" I begin to laugh because of the weed but I know for sure if he say this to me when I was sober and would kill him. After 5 min we arrived at a big house and see a beautiful blond girl walking towards the car. I step out and let her sit next to zed and I get in the back seat. We finally arrived at the bar and I get out. " I'm Stephanie btw " she shakes my hand. " nice to mee you Stephanie I'm Hardin" I smile at her.

We walk inside and of course Molly is here I should have stayed at the frat house. I feel two hand around my neck and a drunk Molly hanging all over me. " hey Hardin " she is wasted like always . " molly" I say cold. I push her a little away so i can take a shot because if I really have to listen to her then I really need a couple shots.
After 1 hour I started to get really drunk. I walk outside and sit down on the grass and take my cigarettes. " hey there stranger what are you doing her in the cold" I look in the eyes of Steph . " I didn't know you where here too".

" did you know it" I light up my cigarette. " what did I know" she looks at me with a confused look as she taking the place next to me. " your crush has a girlfriend  " I laugh  " I don't have a crush". " of course you do zed it is " I take a sip from my cup. I don't know how I got it but yeah who cares. " ow well that's not important did you know Tessa is coming back" she say out of the blue . " how " I was confused I didn't hear anything about this . " I hear Trevor talking to her on the phone she's back tomorrow" Steph takes
my cigarettes and take one out of the case. Maybe I can make it up to her I think by myself. " I'm going inside again " she stands  up and walk inside.

I want to stand up and feel my phone buzzing into my pocket. I take my phone without looking and answer it " with hardin". " hey it's me Tessa" I hear from the other side. " hey Tess " I try  not to freak out. " uhm I'm coming back tomorrow and I was thinking that we can meet at Starbucks " I hear her voice shake a bit. " yeah of course and I really do love you" Im waiting for an answer but she doesn't say it back. " I'm sorry Hardin I have to go to sleep I need to wake up early tomorrow goodnight". I want to say something but she already declined the call. I sigh and stand up and walk inside and walk towards zed. " I'm going home" I look at them . " are you gonna walk" he say confused. " yeah it 30 min walking and I can sober up a bit see you next time".

After 30 minutes I finally arrived and walk upstairs towards my room. I open the door and get inside and lock the door. I undress myself and lay down in bed. I look at the ceiling. I really hope she will forgive me but I think I'm giving myself hope. I truly love her..........

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Written on 10-09-2023
Rewritten on 11-12-2023