Haven ✔️

Ch. 58 Another Attempt

Sunstreaker's P.O.V.
The others are waiting for us by the cafeteria. Now Jamie will know her family is safe. I'm hoping they're done with whatever they've been doing. I don't think Jamie is ready to not see her family all day. Even if she can also sense Energon signatures. I tell Drift what Jamie told me. I hate the only thing to do is to keep doing this. He's already told her I won't hurt him or the others. I know he's also worried about my anxiety, but he's right about this needing to be routine to help both Jamie and me.

Crosshairs and Drift still take Jamie to talk to her after lunch. I'm hoping that'll help.
"So?" Lightning asks.
"I still can't talk to her without getting anxious, and I don't feel like Jamie not talking to me is her typical not much of a talker behavior."
"I'm not liking your anxiety," Sideswipe comments, "or how there's not much we can do to deal with that. I hate feeling when you're dealing with anxiety."
"I said I'm not sending you to Cybertron," we hear Optimus.
"That doesn't matter when Jamie isn't sure if she wants to be my friend or just not hate me," I explain, "and I don't know if Lily will be coming back. It's feeling like my sire is right."
"You know Jamie's history," Optimus reminds me, "this will take time, but I think much progress has been made."

"...go with Sunstreaker to his art room," we hear Drift. Even while Jamie isn't looking displeased, I don't know about this, "show her some paintings," Drift suggests.
I don't know how that'll help me, but I have an idea. I'll have to talk to Crosshairs and Drift later.

Jamie likes the paintings I show her. We decide to work on a painting of the beach. I'm still struggling to get Jamie to talk to me. I can't get used to this, even if this is how she is. I hate the reason why.
Uh, Sunstreaker? Sideswipe asks through the bond.
I hate everything she's been through and what I put her through. She won't talk to me about anything.
It's going to take time. Drift told me Jamie was struggling while talking to Veronica. Sideswipe argues.
That's not helping.
This makes me livid at what Jamie went through. If she was struggling to befriend Veronica...

Jamie's P.O.V.
I feel that energy as Sunstreaker sits on the floor by the wall.
"Sunstreaker?"
I couldn't believe how fast Sideswipe rushes into the room. What does he feel while I'm sensing this energy?
"Sunstreaker, hey, you're ok," Sideswipe says.
Sideswipe makes Sunstreaker look at him. Trying to get him to calm down.

Sunstreaker is calm within a few minutes. The quickest I've felt this energy fade.
"You know I can feel when he's lying," Sideswipe starts, "like you can sense that he's lying. You can't tell me he's been lying. I feel anxiety when he talks to you. This is hard for him."
I sit in front of Sunstreaker. I was not expecting Sideswipe to move Sunstreaker's arms on me. I can't tell if Sunstreaker is aware of what's happening. It's a quiet few minutes until Sideswipe says we're going to the twins' room.

Sunstreaker lies on his bed. He's exhausted from the anxiety attack, and it's not even the worst. 
"You know how hard this is for him. He's been trying. Do you remember he found you? He worried he didn't return to the base in time." Sunstreaker is listening to this but doesn't say anything. "you know Optimus has to agree with this. Others agree; some are uncertain, and some hate this idea. This was my idea because I think you two are a lot alike, and I think you two can help each other."
Sideswipe looks concerned seconds before Sunstreaker rushes to the bathroom and throws up. I feel that energy. It's not good that Sunstreaker thinks he needs to lie on the bathroom floor. Sideswipe gets Sunstreaker's water bottle.
"Do I need to get the medics?" Sideswipe asks.
"No," Sunstreaker replies before needing to throw up again.
I sit on the couch, waiting for Sideswipe to tell me to leave.

Not even five minutes pass before someone knocks on the door. Crosshairs and Drift are concerned. I answered the door. Drift walks right by me.
"Sunstreaker?" I hear Drift.
Crosshairs walks towards the bathroom as Sideswipe explains what's happening to both mechs, including what he told me before Sunstreaker needed to throw up. Drift tells the mechs to help Sunstreaker to his bed before rushing out of the room.
Sunstreaker looks awful as he's helped to his bed. Not caring he is being helped. Even Crosshairs helping him drink water before he lies down, or the mech is checking if Sunstreaker is sick. Technically, he is with anxiety. 

Sunstreaker's P.O.V.
I hate feeling like this. How my anxiety spikes up. I don't know why Sideswipe talking to Jamie caused more anxiety. I don't know what I'm going to do. Jamie lies on the bed behind me. Probably in case I need to throw up again.
I don't know how much time has passed until Drift returns to the room. I'm still throwing up.
"This is going to help," Drift explains and shows me the syringe before injecting.
Knowing Sideswipe already talked to me, Crosshairs and Drift don't say anything but watch me to ensure I'm ok.
Within twenty minutes, I'm starting to feel better. Drift wants me to stay in the room until two when the drug will be in full effect. Jamie sees how her guardians worry about me, yet she doesn't — or somewhat does.
I think what I told her will help. Sideswipe claims.
I don't know. I only hope this ends soon and in a good way.
Doesn't help that Jamie doesn't talk much, to begin with. Getting her to talk to me is going to be another challenge.