INTERNAL CRIES

Kabanata 18

Kabanata 18
Changed


Kahit pagod ako dahil sa mahabang biyahe ay hindi pa rin ako nakaramdam ng antok. Binabagabag ako ng nararamdaman ko tungkol kay Kheeno. I don’t know why I reacted like that when I didn’t even know him.

Why is he angry at me when I addressed him with po? He looks older than me, so I just show my respect to him. I just want to thank him dahil sa pagsundo niya sa akin, but why is he angry? He acted like I made a horrible mistake by addressing him with po. Kasalanan ko bang mas matanda naman talaga siya kaysa akin?

Ngumuso ako dahil sa naisip.

I know I’m at fault for not asking his name when I met him, pero kasi, he intimidated me. Para kasing kaunting galaw ko lang ay may maisusumbat siya. Kaya mas pinili ko na lang na manahimik at huwag umimik.

I sighed because of thoughts that were running on my mind.

Alas sinco y medya na si Daddy nakauwi galing sa trabaho, kaya nagmadali akong bumaba nang marinig ang sasakyan nitong pumarada sa garahe.

Hindi ko pa nalilibot ang hacienda ngayon. Plano ko sanang bisitahin ang kabayo ko. Sabi kasi ni Daddy ay may kabayo akong alaga noong nandito ako. Gusto ko sanang bumaba kanina, pero naglalayag ang isip ko tungkol kay Kheeno, kaya nakalimutan ko rin ang plano ko.

I don’t know either if my friends here know that I’m coming… or do I have? Aside from Rhomisor and Joysie, I don’t know if I have other friends here. I have complicated memories because of the operation, kaya kung sino lang talaga ang pinapakilala sa akin ni Daddy, iyon lang din talaga ang kilala ko. Videos from my old life help me big time to recognize them.

I want to familiarize the surroundings too.

“Can I go to equestrian tomorrow, Dad? Or roam around the land?” I asked my father while we were eating dinner.

Sobrang iba talaga ang mga pagkain na araw-araw kong kinakain sa Finland at dito sa Pinas. Though, my father sometimes prepares Filipino dishes, iba pa rin talaga kapag you are in your place.

“Hmm… I have another important meeting tomorrow, Kenna, I can’t accompany you.” Dad took a sip on his water and looked at me.

“I can ask someone in the hacienda to accompany me. What do you think, Dad?”

Bumalik si Daddy sa pagkain. Nanatili akong nakatingin sa kanya, naghihintay ng sagot.

“Hmm… I can ask Rhomisor if he’s not busy tomorrow to accompany you, or one of our people who took care of the horses. Marami namang magagaling sa kabayo na tauhan natin, I can ask one if Rhom is not available.”

Pumalakpak ako sa tuwa dahil sa sinabi ni Daddy bago nagpatuloy sa pagkain. Mabuti na lang at hindi iyong Kheeno ang naisipan niyang esuhistiyon!

My father talks about the company and the possibilities of his retirement. I even got shocked and almost choked with water when he said that that ‘Kheeno guy’ is the CEO of our company! Like, what the hell? Why did he ask the CEO of the company to pick me up at the airport!? Kaya pala siguro galit iyon kasi nautusan siya!

“He’s Rhomisor’s brother? Why does Rhom look approachable and a good boy? But his brother is…” I cut off my words and bit my lower lip when my father stared at me.

“His brother is?” my father asked. Ngumuso ako.

“He’s masungit and parang laging pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa.” Natawa si Daddy dahil sa sinabi ko kaya napanguso ulit ako. “He’s like a monument who only talks if he was forced and if it’s needed,” I added.

“Mabait naman si Kheeno, anak, ganoon lang talaga siya.”

Mas lalo akong napanguso at napa-isip sa sinabi ni Daddy. Saan banda ang mabait doon? Why do I feel strange towards him? Bakit feeling ko sa akin lang siya masungit?

“Anyway, Dad, I can go to work this coming Monday so I can help you. You said that I have an office in the plantation before we go to Finland for my operation, maybe I can help you manage it?”

Nag-angat ulit ng tingin si Daddy sa akin.

“Isn’t it too early for you to go back to work? Katatapos mo lang ng mga project mo sa Finland, hindi ba?”

“Nah, I’m good with it, Dad, ayaw kong nakatambay lang dito sa bahay. Saka, as far as I know hindi naman mabigat ang trabaho sa plantation, hindi ba? And you said that there are people who can help me whenever I need one.”