Was It Just A Game - Pedri Gonzalez

chapter 20

Isabels Pov
It's been about a month since everything happened. I haven't spoken to Pedri since, and I haven't really left my house much, to be honest.

The only time I'm really doing anything is when Fermin comes over and we all hang out.
We've gotten kinda close because he's been taking care of me. But the only thing is I don't know how I'm supposed to trust a boy again after Pedri.....

Sira comes over every so often. Her and Ferran did have a massive fight over the whole thing....and broke up for a bit, but then they got back together a few days ago. Pedri and Gavi still aren't talking......Gavi just sticks with Fermin during training, and sometimes Eric comes over to them. He's kinda stuck in the middle he doesn't know what to do....Pedri and Ferran obviously just stick together in training.

Currently, I'm just lying in my bed, and I stare up at the ceiling. The boys are at training.....I still haven't come to terms with what happened. I just don't understand why is it always me that has to deal with this heartbreak.....but why do I still have feelings for him.....and what if he was telling the truth.....what if he did fall in love with me......

I get out of bed, and I get dressed into some leggings and a sports bra. I walk downstairs, and I fill up my water bottle, and I start walking. I don't really know where I'm going to be honest. But how I ended up outside his house, who knows.

He's not even home......but I sit down on the front step and wait for him.
About a half hour passes, and the black porche pulls up. He gets out and runs over to me.
"Isa, are you okay???" He said, and I looked up at him. "Come on, let's get you inside...." He said and helped me up. I get up and walk inside his house.

I push his chest angerely. "I hate that I can't hate you.....I hate that i still love you....." I cry, and he sighs."Isa..- " "No pedri, you hurt me....." I cried, and he came over to me. "Isa....I didn't mean to, okay.....I was idiot.....I meant it when I told you....I love you..." He said and cupped my face. "And I still do...." He whispers. I looked into his eyes, and then I pushed him away.

"No! I'm not falling for it again...." I walk away and sit down on the couch. "Isa, why are you here?..." He asked and set down. "Because I stupidly missed you...." I mumble and look down. He sighs and looks at me. "I missed you too...." He said, and I looked up.

"You were the first person I opened to......who I was intimate with since......" I look down, and he looks at me. "Since what Isa?" He asked, and I looked at him. "When I was 17.....I was sexually assaulted by a man outside a club....." I said, and I started crying. "Isa....." He comes over and hugs me. I cry into his chest. "You were the first guy I was finally able to trust......and be intimate with.....and you did this all for a stupid game...." I said and pulled away.

"Isa.....you need to understand....it wasn't all a game to me....yes maybe at the start... but I did really fall in love with you...." He said and cupped my cheeks. "Everyday all I think about is how much I fucked up.....and lost an amazing person like you....." He said and I looked down. "I hate that I still love you.....After everything...." I whisper. He nods. "I know......" He said and pushed hair behind my ear. I looked up and looked into his eyes.

"Just tell me if you want me to stop...." He says as he leans in. I don't say anything, and I let him kiss me. I kiss him back, and I pull him close to me. He hovers over me as I lie back on the couch. He deepens the kiss, and I tangle my fingers up in his hair. He kisses down my neck, and I moan softly as he sucks on my neck.

He pulls away from my neck and looks into my eyes. "I love you, Isa.....I mean it..." He said, and I nodded. "I love you too....but I'm sorry.....I just can't forgive you.....maybe someday but not right now...." I sit up and push him off me.

"Goodbye, Pedri...." I said as I walked out of the door. He didn't go after me because he knew you just needed space....and if that was the last time he'd see you....it was the perfect goodbye...

I walked home, and I arrived in the door, and I broke down crying as I slid to the floor. Pablo rushes over and picks me up. "Hey, what happened...." He said as he carried me to the couch. "I went to see him....." I cried, and he sighed. "I hate that I still love him after everything....." I cry, and he nods. "I know.....its hard...." He said, and I wiped my tears. "I think he still truly does love me.....I believe him now... but I just can't forgive him...." I whisper, and he nods. "I know....." He hugs me, and I just cuddle into his chest. I end up falling asleep, and he carries me to my room.