Oh. My. Fate?! (BL, Volume 12, Part 1)

131 In Preparation for the Future

Back in the Nine Heavens, Qiu Ling had watched quietly as Jing He broke down, his heart squeezing painfully. His beloved had suffered so much ... Just why was fate so cruel to him? Why could his life not be easier? Why did he need to go through so much pain again and again?

Thinking about it, Jing He truly seemed to never get a rest. Even though Bai Fen still hadn't told him anything about Jing He's childhood because there hadn't really been time since he arrived at the Heavenly Emperor's palace, Qiu Ling still knew that those centuries had not been easy for Jing He and had instead been fraught with danger. After that ... there had only been eighteen years until he descended for his trial.

The mortal realm should have been his reprieve but instead, he only found a different kind of suffering there. It even happened to be one that was interwoven with the life of his true incarnation, making the experience even more heart-wrenching. When it finally ended, it wasn't truly over either and he still had to regain those memories one by one, stumbling upon things that would scare him or make him doubt.

In Jing He's life, had there ever been a time when he was at peace?

Qiu Ling stared at the water mirror in front with heartache. It ... did not seem to be the case. No matter when, he could never just be his unburdened self. There was always a consequence from the past to bear, some expectations of others to fulfill, or a certain image to uphold. He could never be just Jing He. That kind of life ... it was too sad.

Qiu Ling sighed and reached up, his fingertips touching the mirror. Maybe it was because this one was created by Tian but the surface didn't even ripple as he traced Jing He's face. He would have given a lot to be at his side at this moment. But then, what he saw at that moment had happened hours ago. Even if he could go to the High Heavens to accompany him, he wouldn't be able to hold him in his arms and comfort him just at that moment when he needed it the most.

Retracting his hand, he sighed faintly. He had done what he could on Jing He's end by convincing Tian to let him get An Xin and leave it with Jing He. He was doing what was possible on his father's end by showing off his best side every single day, trying to slowly convince him that he would be a worthy son-in-law, somebody who deserved Jing He. And yet, in the face of those tears, it didn't seem to be enough.

"Just what can I do?"

He stared at Jing He's face but his mind came up blank. There was no way to go and be with Jing He. Even just seeing him was a gift given by Tian and not something he could achieve on his own. In such circumstances, what options did he have? He could only wait until ...

Qiu Ling paused and then slowly tilted his head. Yes, he couldn't do anything for Jing He directly as long as they were separated this way. But one day, Jing He would return to him. Maybe at that time, he would have put his worries behind him and become more self-confident. But chances were that even if he had made some progress, he wouldn't have managed to go the whole way. Since that was the case ... shouldn't he try to help him along further?

When he thought of this, Qiu Ling's eyes lit up. He still hated seeing Jing He in this state but now, he felt like he could catch a glimpse of their future: Someday, after Jing He had made his decision, after he had become a trueborn god again and returned to the Nine Heavens, things would be different. There wouldn't be any fear of separation, no doubts about the other's feelings, or hesitation because of outside opinions. It wouldn't be instantaneous but it would happen.

As for right now, while he might not be able to accompany his beloved, he could prepare for that day to come. Yes, he wasn't completely powerless. He had things he could do even if they wouldn't have an instantaneous effect and couldn't comfort his beloved at this time.

Qiu Ling took a deep breath and then slowly exhaled. He felt slightly calmer after making his decision. Now, reminding himself that what he saw had happened hours ago, he continued to watch quietly.

Finally, the scene on the water mirror caught up to where he had interrupted Tian before. The image swirled and when it became clear again, Jing He was already lying in bed, sleeping sweetly. Qiu Ling smiled as soon as he saw him like this.

Even though Jing He's current mood was likely this calm because he hadn't realized yet what had happened to him, it at least meant he had a short reprieve before the reality would set in. This was good. Jing He should have a little more time to come to terms with everything. That way, he might be able to take it better.

Since there was not much to see, Qiu Ling quietly took out a scroll of paper, picked up the ink slab, and started to grind it slowly. His gaze still stayed on the water mirror for the most part though. While Jing He might be asleep, he would never tire of seeing him this way either.

It truly was a pity that he could only watch from afar. He would have given a lot to be right there with him. Even if he had to leave before Jing He woke up, just having a few hours of being close would have been nice. Well, he couldn't expect Tian to indulge him that much, could he?

Qiu Ling shook his head at the thought, picked up the brush, and then slowly started to write.