The Chosen.

Candor

"June." i feel my shoulders being softly shaken, forgetting everything that occurred tonight i open my eyes hoping to see Bill's staring back at me. But instead i am greeted by the side profile of my boyfriends corpse i still cling to. In an instant everything rushes back, i pull his body into me trying to scream but nothing comes out of my dry, raw throat.

"Honey, we can't leave him here all night." Zeke says to me, the most tenderly i've ever heard him speak. Trying to lift me from Bill he takes my wrists in his hands.

"NOOOO! DON'T TOUCH HIM!" i manage to scream out before my hand flies to my throat to soothe the agony. I squirm on the blood coated floor scooting myself back to my best friend. His cold body under me feels so wrong. My memory flashes back to our steamy bodies sliding against each other in the bath, the sound of his giggle as he picked up my naked figure in his strong arms. Oh my Bill, my sweetest angel in the whole world, look what they've done to you.

The sun shining into my eyes wakes me, but i can't seem to force my eyelids open. I eventually am able to pry them open ripping out a few of my lashes. I then realize my eyes were crusted shut with Bill's blood. Zeke and Tom stir at my awakening, waiting in anticipation for me to scream and cry again so they could console me once more. But instead, i begrudgingly bring my stiff body off the hard tile,

"Okay, I'm ready." The boys nod at me understanding it is now time to lay our best friend to rest.

I watch the orange sun rise into the sky as Zeke and Tom dig a grave for Bill. I lie in the lounger Bill and i shared just the night previous, stroking the soft fabric remembering how incredible it felt to be touched by him. My breath begins to shake again and before a tear can even fall from my eyes i feel Mia's arms wrap around me. I turn my head into her blonde hair, letting myself lose my composure.

I stare at the dirt, jealous, wishing i was lying on top of Bill's body instead. I want to be dead, i want to be buried in there with my best friend. I just want this aching in my chest to stop and i don't really care how.

"Bill, you were one hell of a guy. I'll miss that smile." Zeke murmurs trying to say a few words in remembrance of Bill

"Our sweet Bill, you were a shining light in this world. You will forever be missed." Mia hugs into Tom's side

I look to Tom, his eyes are almost swollen shut and he has snot running down his face. "Bill, i loved you since we were born, I'm sorry- i couldn't- be there. I love you-brother." He hits his knees in a sob after talking to his other half. All eyes now point to me, but i honestly have nothing to say,

"Bill, you were my soulmate. And i wish i was dead with you."

Mia and Zeke both gasp at my candor of wishing to be dead. I have no desire to be pleasant anymore, I have to be real and honest. The truth is i want to fucking die.

"June." Mia says reaching out to my arm

"Shut the fuck up Mia." i slip my hands into my hoodie pocket as i turn around to walk back into the hotel.