Parker

Chapter 39

"You're going to be okay." Rodger assured Carson as they walked out of the room.  He patted him on the back which elicited a small smile from the eighteen year old.

"Thank you sir." Carson said but had his doubts. He did not think that there would have ever be a time where he will be truly okay. His parents and Mister Gaines had damaged him way too much. And he was not sure even Rodger's love and support would ever fix that.

"By the way what was the other thing you wanted to talk about?" Rodger asked.

Carson gave him an awkward look. "I wanted to see if you were okay."

"If I was okay?" Rodger said confused.

"I heard you and Parker talking last night."

"Oh." Rodger said somberly.

"I wasn't eavesdropping." Carson put his hands up. "But I could not help but hear your conversation." He gave the older man a sympathetic look. "He really tore into you last night."

"Yes, he did." Rodger said. "But I deserved it." A look of guilt was in his eyes as he spoke.

"Yeah you did." Carson said. Nervousness rippled across his face. "No offense."

"None taken." Rodger said. "I screwed up." He said as they walked down the stairs. "And I don't know how to fix it."

"Can I give you some advice."

"Sure." Rodger said curious.

"Stop bad mouthing your other kids to him." Carson said to his surprise. "No offense sir but when you talk badly about them it makes your love sound conditional and plays into his insecurities. He is scared that if he messes him up you will stop loving him like you did your other kids."

"I do love my other kids." Rodger said angrily. He looked at Carson livid as he wondered how he could suggest a thing.  I never stopped loving my other children. They were the ones who stopped loving me.

"It did not sound like to me last night, sir." Carson said. "And I bet it does not sound like to Parker." Carson then looked at him nervously wondering if he went to far. Nervous knots formed in his stomach as he told himself that he should have kept his mouth shut.

He is going to kick me out now Carson thought. I'm going to have to go stay with Mister Gaines. He began to feel to sick to the stomach. Please don't make me go to stay with him.

Beat my backside black and blue if you must but please don't kick me out.

"I'm sorry if I offended you, sir." He said.

"No, I'm sorry." Rodger said. "I didn't realize how my attitude towards my other kids could be affecting my relationship with Parker and I thank you for telling me that."

"You're welcome, sir."

(Accidentally hit publish. Will continue rest of chapter later)