Love and Hate| Natasha Romanoff

19. What?

Y/N'S POV:

I couldn't sleep. Not knowing what was happening with Wanda hurts. Sure, I've gotten close to these people but I still feel like an outsider, I still don't fully fit in. The last thing I want is to lose these people's trust, especially so early on into me somewhat joining. But I can't help the tossing and turning. I could read her mind but, she'd notice and I don't wanna hurt her even more.

I ended up getting some sleep. Thankfully since I was put on bed rest, I didn't have to wake up at 5am to train so you'd think I'd get more sleep than usual, right? Wrong.

"Y/n." I don't open my eyes but I know exactly who's voice that is.

"Y/n, come on, get up." I feel my bed dip as she sat at the edge.

"Mmmm, I don't wanna." She gets up and turns on the light.

"What about now?" She walks back and sits on the bed again.

"Nat, come onnnnn." I slowly begin to open my eyes to see her beautiful pair, puffy. Breaks my heart.

"Nat?" I sit up and pull her closer to me.

"Yes?"

"Were you crying?" She goes wide eyes for a moment before playing it cool again.

"No, what makes you think that?" She scoffs and side eyes me.

"Your eyes are incredibly puffy and your nose is still lightly runny." She stays silent for a moment.

"Fine, I was. I just- I got so worried about you. I only just got you, I can't lose you, at LEAST not this quick."

"You sure about that? If I died right now, you'd be the last person I've ever liked and dated."

"That's not funny."

"It wasn't supposed to be funny, it was supposed to sound appealing."

"Nope."

"Look Nat, you're not gonna lose me, alright? If it'll make you feel better, I can explain everything that happened last night."

"Please do."

I explain everything, how I tried using my powers and they didn't wake me up and that I think that's the cause of the seizure like response my body had. I told her about the tests Bruce is gonna be running, and their backup plan.

"Oh, by the way, have you talked to Wanda at all?" She asks after saying she understood.

"I tried." I sigh and explain again. "I was on my way to your room last night when I was released but I heard Wanda sniffling, I tried to ask what was wrong but she said she couldn't talk to me at the moment. I don't know what I did but I think I did something that made her mad. I feel so bad but I can't apologize, I can't since I don't know. I was a little distracted because of that so, I'd completely forgotten to go to your room."

"Well, shouldn't we try to see what happened?"

"We should but I don't know if she's ready to talk to me yet."

"Come on, let's try."

We got up and left my room. We walked hand in hand to Wanda's room. Natasha knocked but nothing. I knocked, nothing.

"Wanda?" Natasha calls out, hoping that she'd open up for her.

"Natasha please, I can't see anyone right now."

"Come on, haven't you had breakfast yet?"

"No, I can't leave my room."

"Wanda please, can you at least tell us what's wrong?" I butt in.

"Alright, listen Wanda. You're gonna come and get a a plate of food, then we're gonna come back up to your room and talk about what's happening. This is non negotiable."

We hear her get up and out of bed. She comes to open the door but as soon as she does and sees me, she shuts it again.

"Wanda please, what did I do?!" With that she opened the door again and pulled me in for a tight hug as she began sobbing.

"Nothing... you did nothing. You couldn't do anything so you were so little and- and I- I... I took everything from you." I hug her back just as tight despite my confusion

"Wanda, what's wrong? What are you talking about?"

"It- it was me. When you were with hydra as a baby, I was the one that held you down. You were screaming, crying, not in the way babies normally do. In pain, agony, and I had my powers, I knew, I could feel it and I knew what I was doing and I didn't stop and now here you are with this fucking curse of a power all because of me. Pietro warned me and I just- I didn't listen and I'm so, so, sorry, y/n."

"Okay, let's go get you a plate of food, then we'll talk about this okay? Can we do that?" She nods her head so we head down.

Since it was somewhat late in the morning, the idiot boys took all the food there was for breakfast so I told nat to take Wanda back to her room so that I could get us breakfast down the street at our favorite café. I came back with croissants and coffee.

"Okay..." I put all the food on her nightstand. "Let's talk, shall we? What exactly worried you Wanda?"

"You hate me... I ruined your life, and when you were a baby." She was no longer crying but her voice was obviously strained, tired, and used.

"I don't hate you Wanda, I could never. My powers? They didn't ruin shit, in fact, they've made everything better cuz without them, I couldn't have met you, Nat, the team, my favorite shield agents. And that's all because of you. If anything you've made my life better, and as for the pain and screaming, I was a baby, I probably should but don't remember any of it, I was like 1 1/2 years old."

"S-so you don't hate me for what I did?"

"No, matter of fact, it makes me like you even more."

"How do you do that, y/n?"

"Do what?" 

"You always know what to say..." 

"I don't know, I guess I'm just awesome like that." I shrug my shoulders and she playfully punches my arm. 

"You've sure as hell been quiet." We both turn to Natasha who was just sitting at the corner of the bed, eating her croissant with coffee, zoned out. 

"Yeah... I just remembered, we totally missed Rhodey's birthday." 

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I'd like to once again apologize for the SHIT I'm putting out here... 

STAY HYDRATED AND REMEMBER TO EAT 

                                                                                ~A