Memo from Captain Levi:
To whom it may concern,
Do to recent incidents (A.K.A The celebration held for new recruits) alcohol will no longer be served as a beverage for any occasion. Commander Erwin has asked me to inform you that tomorrow morning everyone is required to help with clean up and repairs in the mess hall. The big one, being caused by game of beer pong, in which Jean Kirstein successfully landed a ball into a cup of booze and Eren Jaeger drank it. Causing Eren, due to choking, to transform into titan form.
Also please know that any claims I made while drunk were probably false. I have never slaughtered thirty-seven titans naked with only a razor and toothpick. I have also never been a stripper, making millions, in Wall Sina. However, I have in fact scrubbed fifty-six windows in under a minute.
Lastly, I do apologize to the solider who's bed I slept in last night, then vometed on, and afterwards set it on fire in a drunken attempt to clean it.
Yours Truly, Captain Levi
Eren: *writes: I forgive you Captain <3*
