Goodbye Troyler // EDITING

17.)Unfortunate Truth

Tyler's POV

Troye had gone to the Studio to work on his album, and I had a couple meetings to get to today. Which didn't sound very fun.

He was leaving tomorrow and I couldn't begin to express how upset I was about it. Especially considering I wouldn't be coming this time. It gave me a feeling between utter sadness and heart brake which didn't make much sense.

Last year, I remember going to Perth for his birthday and meeting his Friends, and other relatives I didn't get a chance to meet before then.

I smiled at the memory of running in his back yard with the on land seal trailing behind us. Jagga, the dog/seal was as happy as can be to be playing outside. And I for one, was happy to be playing with her. Troye was running along as Jagga ran after him and he jumped on my back to escape the mighty beast, who was in fact rolling on the ground with her tongue out. His teeth were showing in a cheesy smile, and I couldn't help but love when he acted like a child.

Jokingly, I pretended to drop the boy, And he smacked my shoulder and whined, " Tylahh, don't drop me." Giving my signature lipless smile, I ran along with him on my back. His arms were hung tightly around my neck. That was a good day.

--

My second meeting nearly ended and my lack of sleep was catching up to me. Let's just say, Troye and I weren't very happy about not spending time together the next day, so we comprised last night. I was still sore. ( I'm trash, Omg.)

Signing the papers, I finally was done and only had one meeting left to go to. The building I was in, was huge and they had about 8 elevators. But somehow, I managed to get in the one that would change my happiness.

Two men came in at the same time as I and I just stood in the corner on my phone of course. Not really trying to, I listened in on their conversation.

" Charlie I just think he is being selfish. She is 20." One of them growled.

" Yeah so what. They love eachother age differences shouldn't matter." The other replied. I was with him on that.

" She hasn't lived yet. Sure they love eachother but they are talking about Marriage and children. Let her go around dating and sleeping with other people living her life, he is ruining the girls 20s."

" Whatever it's not our business, they will figure it out hopefully." The man who's name I believe is Charlie explained while exiting the elevator with his friend.

My mind went to a place that it's visited before but always just forgot. Is there a chance that I was holding Troye back? Considering he is so young, and still has so much to discover.

Maybe I'm not giving him a chance to be free. Holding him back because I was ready to settle down, when Troye isn't even 20 yet. Omg, What have I done.

If I didn't stop this he wouldn't get to know that those years were crazy but fun. Every guy that you sleep with means nothing when your finally ready. It wouldn't be fair to not let him figure that out. I knew for a fact that Troye was my soul mate, but was I his?

I don't know what's worse. Knowing what you have to do, but wanting nothing more then to not do it. Physically getting sick over the thought of letting the boy go. Or knowing that if I do this and Troye will be hopefully happier, that he could find someone who is not me. Not me. He could meet someone and they could date and fall in love. Make him laugh harder then I ever could. Smile with his teeth every second of the day. Just be happy.

Nothing sounded worse. Absolutely nothing. But this isn't about me. I needed to do this for Troye, and he could hate me. Like really hate me.

I held the bracelet that I had bought for Troye for his birthday. The texture was soft like any hard surface was. I put his life on the front of that metal accessory. And on the inside I put mine. He was my life.

And I was about it give it up. A emotional and physical suicide.

Authors Note: Ahhhh. Sorry for the long wait for the update I really just couldn't even handle what I wrote.

Thanks for reading I love you guys so much xx