Doomed From The Start: A Marriage Agreement

chapter 20: something more

                     ⬽J A A N V I⤘   

After cleaning up the kitchen, I made my way upstairs and headed to my room. The dinner with Arya went great, and I'm actually happy that I was able to cook something he liked. Despite his easy behavior, he seemed tired tonight. I worry that he spends too much time at work. He seemed restless; I wonder if he even sleeps. I wish that he wouldn't neglect his health like that.

Passing by his room in the hallway, I noticed that his door is slightly ajar. I wonder what he's doing now. Walking towards it, I gently pushed open the door to come face to face with an empty room.

"Arya?" I called softly, but I didn't get a reply. Arya wasn't there. I wonder where he had gone in the middle of the night. Walking back, I checked the other rooms, the backyard, and even the library, but he's nowhere to be found. The only place I haven't checked is the balcony, and I know Arya must be there.

I then headed there. The cool night air greeted me as I stepped outside, and there, beneath the starry expanse, I found Arya sitting on a far corner, lost in contemplation.

I observed him silently for a moment, his gaze fixed on the vast sky; he seemed oblivious to my presence, lost in something that I had no control over. The balcony, a quiet sanctuary, had become a refuge for Arya's thoughts.

"Couldn't sleep either?" I asked gently, breaking the silence as I approached him. Arya turned, a flicker of surprise crossing his face.

"I was just... needed some fresh air," he replied vaguely, his eyes returning to the stars.

He looked sadder than usual. The easy lightness he displayed during dinner wasn't there on his face. Something is bothering him, I felt, just like the last time from our engagement night.

I took a seat beside him by the ledge, letting my legs dangle down. Arya didn't bother to say anything. I could sense the sadness enveloping him; I know he has some deep regrets. I wish I could make him forget those things so that he'd be happier.

Looking at the sky, I gently pondered, "Sometimes, the night sky holds more answers than we realize," I said, leaning forward and hugging my knees, hoping to start up a conversation.

"But how does one ever find it? Even the stars shift positions every day. Nothing is ever constant," he whispers, his voice trailing into the quiet night. I felt the weight of his words.

I pondered his statement for a while, then leaning back slightly, I continued, "Maybe it's not about finding something constant, Arya. Perhaps, it's about learning to navigate through the shifts, finding beauty in the fleeting moments and embracing the ebb and flow of life."

Arya remained silent, his eyes still fixed on the stars.

After a long tense minute, Arya sighed and leaned his head back against the wall. "I just wish... I could change some things," he finally confessed, giving in to his vulnerability.

"That's the thing, though; you can't. The past never changes. But you can still make amends and have control over your future," I offered, trying to reassure him with the best I can. I don't know what burdens he carries. I just hope that my words do him justice.

Arya met my gaze, a deep sadness clouded his eyes. Seeing him like that made my heart ache. I desperately wanted to erase the sadness in his expression. It hurt to see him hurting.

"It's hard to let go," he finally admitted, the weight of regret evident in his words.

"I know," I responded softly, "but sometimes, holding onto the past can keep us from moving forward."