When I woke up that morning Kayn was wrapped around me. It was like I was bound in a way that prevented escape. In his sleep, he seemed so peaceful.
After we both had a shower and got dressed I was offered a redo of the café date that had recently been a bit of a flop. We got to the café and were seated in a private area to not draw unwanted attention. We placed our orders and received our drinks.
"So," Kayn started the conversation, "what is your family like?"
"Heh," I gave a halfhearted laugh, "all of my grandparents are dead. My extended family is comprised of drug addicts. My mom and dad were master manipulators. They wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer. Hell, they sent applications to colleges without me even knowing. When I saved up enough money from waiting tables at the local burger joint I packed my shit and moved here. On my way out of the door, they told me to forget about them because they didn't want their mistake to come around ever again."
Kayn's expression was that of an unpleasant smile. "Damn," he huffed. "At least mine weren't even my real parents." He chuckled. When he saw my confused expression he ran his fingers back through his hair. "My biological mother was a drug-addicted prostitute and my biological father was one of her customers. At least that's what the papers say. My adoptive parents were good people... on the outside. They raised me damn near from birth. From a young age, I was rowdy. They tried everything to get me to be their version of perfect. My dad wanted me to do sports and make it into the big leagues. Instead, I locked myself in my room and made music. They pretty much told me the same thing your parents told you when I left."
"Wow," I gasped under my breath.
"Oh," he chuckled, "the doctors thought I was born with heterochromia." He pointed to his red eye. "Turns out it was a birth defect from my drug-loving mother."
"I wanted to ask about it," I admitted softly. "I'm kind of glad I didn't."
"Yeah," he sighed, "I wouldn't have told you before the other day. When we had our little fight in the club."
"Does it make it hard to see?" I asked carefully.
"Nope." He smiled. "It just looks cool and hurts like hell on an occasion. Usually when I'm pissed or have a headache."
"Well..." I looked down at my lap. "I wasn't born quite right either..."
"Oh," his voice sounded intensely curious. "It's cool if it's still an uncomfortable subject."
"I..." I sighed as my hands started to fidget in my lap, "It's something we should talk about sooner rather than later with how things are going." One of my hands grasped my collar. "Especially if this is how you feel... I'm just... I'm just scared you'll react like everyone else."
"Mika," Kayn reached across the table tilting my head so I would look at him, "I'm not going anywhere. I'm sure as fuck not going to think any different of you."
My hand let go of my collar and held his. "I..." I started, looking down at his hand, "I can't have kids. When I was born with an underdeveloped uterus. I don't even get periods. Everything else is normal except for that."
"Does it affect you at all?" He asked gently.
"Not physically," I responded with shame. "It has killed my chances of happiness more times than I can count."
"Cool." He responded casually. "That's fine by me. I don't want kids. Even if I did I wouldn't trust my fucking genes." My eyes trailed up to him in disbelief. "It works perfectly fine for me."
Tears filled my eyes and all I could mutter was, "Oh..."
The sound of a chair being moved sounded beside me. "Hey," he whispered gently as he wiped away my tears, "I'm not lying to you." He pulled to his chest firmly. "I don't care. If kids ever become an idea in our fucked up heads we could adopt one. I don't care."
"Usually I'm left alone when somebody hears that." I sniffled. "So many times I've been looked at with disgust before being told that it's not going to work out."
"Tell me," he whispered tenderly, "is that part of your insecurity issue?" I nodded against his chest. "I'm sorry." He rubbed my back. "They didn't deserve you. That's not something that determines somebody's worth."
We sat there in silence while I let out my emotions against his chest. When my sobs came to a stop Kayn helped me clean up my face. He returned to his side of the table with a gentle expression.
"Sorry," I laughed half-heartedly, "I put a dampener all over our date."
"I prefer real." He assured me. "Life's not all good shit and rainbows. We're living proof of that princess."
I giggled at his statement as I tried to cool my face. "How is it you always seem so confident?" I asked as I wiped my face.
He smiled and took a sip of his drink. "Comes from my childhood." He replied. "I was the only one hyping myself up. Eventually, it stuck."
"You'll have to teach me how to do that." I smiled. "I never feel that confident unless you're by my side."
"Is it the whole me being famous thing?" He asked with a smirk and a raised brow.
"Fuck," I laughed, apparently catching him off guard, "I forget that you're literally in some of my favorite songs sometimes. Since that night we watched the movie I'd practically forgotten."
He looked at me with furrowed brows. "Then, why?" He seemed confused.
"Because," my smile remained in place, "You've shown me parts of myself I never knew existed."
A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, but it didn't stick. "I..." He paused, "That's different. Not in a bad way... just different." His smile finally formed. "Thank you."
