Fate || BENNIFER

Guilt

Ben's P.O.V

I sat at the table, the weight of the world seemingly pressing down on my shoulders. I glanced at the clock, realizing that it had only been a few hours since Jennifer had left for Paris, but it felt like an eternity. The house seemed to have transformed into a chaotic battleground in her absence.

Yelling and laughter echoed through the halls as the kids raced around, their energy seemingly boundless. The noise was deafening, drowning out any semblance of tranquility that I desperately craved. I rubbed my temples, trying to block out the chaos and focus on the script I needed to work on.

But it was impossible. The constant stream of noise invaded my thoughts, making it nearly impossible to string together coherent sentences. I had always admired Jennifer's ability to juggle her career and our family effortlessly, but I couldn't seem to find that same balance.

Looking at the blank document on my laptop screen, I felt a sense of defeat wash over me. The words I had been so eager to pour onto the page seemed to elude me now. I wanted to prove Jennifer that I could handle the challenges that came with her absence, but the reality was far from my expectations. I had to bring some help.

At the living room's table, the soft glow of the screen illuminated my fatigued face. I struggled to keep my eyes open, my mind foggy from hours of working on the script. Suddenly, I felt a gentle touch on my shoulder, causing me to startle awake.

"They're all down." My mother whispered softly.

"You're the best." A grateful smile tugged at the corners of my lips.

She took a seat next to me.

"You should go to bed too." She suggested, concern etching lines on her face.

I sighed, knowing that sleep was a luxury I couldn't afford at the moment.

"I wish I could." I admitted. "But I'm behind schedule."

She sighed softly, her eyes filled with empathy.

"How did you do it with Grace?" I asked. "She's been so fussy all week."

"Old tricks, my dear." She teased. "Too bad I couldn't see her walking."

Determined to share this precious milestone with her, I reached for my phone nestled in the pocket of my gray sweatpants. With a few swift taps, I pulled up a video of Grace taking her first steps.

"Aww. She's grown so much since I last saw her." She said in a nostalgic tone.

"This is the actual video of her first steps." I said, my voice filled with a mixture of pride and regret.

"The actual video?" She questioned, puzzled by my choice of words.

"Jennifer didn't get to see her first steps." I began to explain. "She took her first steps a few days before, in her room. I was alone with her." I sighed. "I thought I would show her this video later, but I never did."

"Wait." Confusion etched across her face as she tried to process the revelation. "I thought you two saw her walking for the first time together."

"I just didn't have the heart to tell her." I confessed.

"That's actually very sweet of you, Ben." Her expression softened.

"I lied to her." My voice heavy with remorse.

"So she could live the happiness of the moment instead of the sadness of having missed it." She replied, her eyes meeting mine.

"You know how bad I am at lying..." I sighed. "It eats me alive."

"Couldn't that be the reason why you can't focus on your writing?" She raised an eyebrow, a hint of concern in her voice. "The guilt of keeping this secret from Jennifer?"

"It was very important for her." I paused. "I don't want to hurt her. And now, there is no point in telling her."

"What you say sounds reasonable, but you don't seem very sure about it." She said.

"What should I do?" I was feeling torn between my desire to be honest and my wish to protect Jennifer. "I don't know what the right decision is here."

"That decision doesn't belong to me, Ben." She met my gaze with a tender smile. "Only you can decide what is best for her, and for yourself."

She rose from her seat, a comforting smile gracing her lips.

"I'll make you coffee." She offered.

"I'm good." I shook my head. "I don't wanna bother you any more. You must be tired too, and eager to get home."

"Don't be silly." She insisted, leaning in to plant a soft kiss upon my head. "I'll stay. If you won't go to bed, neither will I."

Though I wasn't particularly thrilled about my mother sacrificing her rest to keep me company, I knew that nothing I said would change her mind, so I simply mustered a smile, appreciating her gesture.

"Thank you." I murmured softly.

"I'll be right back." She made her way to the kitchen.

My attention was momentarily diverted by the glow of my phone on the table, instantly recognizing a text from Jennifer. My lips curled into a tender smile.

"Just landed in Paris. If my counting isn't off, you must be sleeping, and so are the kids. Miss you. Good night, baby." The text read.

My smile faltered, a pang of remorse tugging at my conscience.