Solarballs Oneshots || 🚀‼️

18 | Earth Angst - "Perfect Nothing"

Requested by @Z_zea_h (hopefully you like this!)

CONTENT WARNING:
THIS ONESHOT WILL CONTAIN MENTIONS OF SUICIDE, DEATH, AND JUST ANGST IN GENERAL. MAKE SURE WHEN READING THIS, YOU WON'T BE TRIGGERED AND ARE IN THE RIGHT STATE OF THOUGHT.

- I see Earth and Luna as brothers, so no they're not in a relationship. The other characters are free to interpretation if you ship them or not!

- Starts with angst, then gets better at the end.

I wanna specifically point out that when writing this, I'm not writing this so you'll all be on one specific characters side. Take every word they say with a grain of salt and with an open mind. This is not a "how-to" tutorial on how to respond to these things. Everyone responds to these stressful situations differently. I think that's important to note. Stay safe, and drink water.

some things will differ from how canon portrayed it. Originally supposed to be JUST earth angst but I think it's traveling to the rest of the inner planets!! at least.. some of them
—

Earth blinked, and he felt searing heat. He closed his eyes, and he saw oceans tainted with plastic. He'd stare into the sky, and all he saw was the reminder of what could've been. Flew too close to the Sun. It was inescapable. He was surrounded by what he let happen to himself. And he couldn't break free. He had miles to go before he could sleep. He wished he could burn his vision out so he wouldn't have to look at what he had become.

Cowardice was in his blood.

He was still in that moment, feeling Luna gripping on his arm and trying to yank him back, feeling the clicking and stuttering of his mind as that moment shattered a part of himself forever. Trash and debris were scattered around his orbit, staying on his trail and haunting his conscience. He couldn't tell what was worse, having it all stay on his surface, infecting his vibrant oceans and destroying his verdant land, or following him around for not even the Sun knows how long.

Stop. Earth told himself, trying to force all his prior thoughts to the back of his head. You can't do this. You promised them, Earth. But there was more than he could take, and he was trapped in this moment. He lost track of what was happening around him, something he had been using as an anchor to ignore the pain. As soon as he did, a jolt of pain shot through him. A strange, metallic taste lapped at his senses for a moment and he slammed his eyes shut against it. Fuckfuckfuck—

It started out as a subtle ache creeping into his body, before suddenly it morphed into a searing, raging inferno that consumed ever fiber of his being. It wasn't just pain; it was a relentless assault on all his senses. He couldn't even tell if he screamed out of pure agony. Earth became dizzy as his vision started having spots, and he struggled to stay upright. I'm fucking SCREWED—

What was someone supposed to do when they were overwhelmed? Take deep breaths, right, yeah. Every breath Earth drew was a struggle and it felt like shards of asteroids tearing through his lungs. Each heartbeat sent shockwaves upon shockwaves of hell coursing through his veins. As a last resort, he tried to cough up whatever seemed to be constricting his lungs. It only rocked his entire body and left him trembling. Through his now hazy vision, Earth saw splattered blood on his hands and clothes. Surely he wasn't coughing that hard??

Distantly Earth could hear... mumbling. That wasn't from him, right?? He couldn't even register what was his voice and what wasn't. He just wanted this to end. He begged for some respite, some momentary end to this... whatever it was. Earth forced himself to stand upright, still slightly shaking as he did so. He hadn't even realized he was crying until he realized how blurred his vision had gotten.