Our destiny

Care for me

The camp ended about two weeks ago. I didn't hear anything from Kate anymore which has been very relaxing. I hope it will remain like this. I didn't get the chance to talk to Ellie tho. She still blocks all my tries of solving this. I'm scared she might move on and date someone else. I know I will never be able to do that. We have been separated for almost two months and I'm still so madly in love with her that I think about her every day. I can't move on. Just this one minute conversation on the door when we switch the boys every two days, is enough to make me feel happy for the day. I love these days where I see her.

Today is one of these days. Ellie will bring the boys over today. The problem is my body. I started my period and it is a heavy one. I already took some pills in the night and hoped for it to get better. It didn't get better. I managed to get up and go downstairs in the morning. I'm now on the couch and can't move. I can't even reach my glass of water on the table. My stomach hurts so hard. I can't move at all. I feel like I have to cry. My body feels weak. I'm cold. I don't even have energy to grab a blanket. I could call my mum to come but I don't want to bother her now.

Then I hear the doorbell ringing. It's probably Ellie. She will bring the boys. I try to move but I can't. I can't get up. There is no way I can open the door. She rings again. I don't want her to think I wouldn't care about my kids. I expected her to call me but instead I hear the door unlocking. She has a key and I don't mind that she has one. I want her to always be able to come here.

"Leah?" She calls in the hallway.

"I'm here." I weakly say. I hope she even heard me. I hear her coming into the living room. I'm actually happy that she is here. Maybe she can at least give me my water and some painkillers.

Ellie comes into the living room with the boys in her arms. Her face changes as she sees me on the couch. She seems worried.

"What happened? Are you okay?" She puts the boys on their playing mat on the ground and comes over at me. It's the first time since she left that I feel like she really cares about me.

"I'm on my period." I say in a weak voice.

"Did you take your pills? Do you need more?" She asks.

"I took one in the morning but it didn't help. It hurts so hard. I can't move." I say and look at her. She doesn't say anything for a moment and then gets up.

"One second." She goes back to the hallway and takes off her jacket and her shoes. What is she doing? She comes back into the living room.

"What do you need?" She asks.

"Can you give me my glass of water?" I just say since I couldn't reach it for a while. Ellie gives me the glass and gets up again.

"I'll get you some painkillers." She says and makes her way upstairs. She still knows where I keep everything. It feels like she never left. She doesn't take long until she comes back and hands me the painkillers which I take down with my water. The cramps are still very bad. My body shakes and my breathing is fast. Ellie sits next to me.

"Leah, you can lay down and maybe try to sleep. I will stay here and watch the boys." Ellie says. She is so nice all of the sudden. Why is she doing this?

"You don't have to stay." I say. Why did I say this? I want her to stay so bad. It's all I want. I want her to stay forever.

"You can't do anything on your own and you definitely can't look after the boys alone but I don't want to take away your time with them. I don't mind staying. Plus I don't hate you that much that I would let you suffer on your own. I know how hard this can get." She says in a soft voice. She is so cute. I wish I could tell her how much I love her. She is so caring for me.