"[...] i'm made for a soul-crushing romance, i need someone who won't be ashamed to worship the ground i walk on, because that's how i love, i give myself completely, i love every day as if there could be no tomorrow, i- god, do you know even one gu...
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yn still coudn't believe that bokuto and aran were a thing. she had her suspicions, but hearing it directly from them that they were a couple was a completely different experience.
'i'm always right,' she thought to herself.
they asked her to keep it a secret because both of them were beginning their professional careers, and she promised to keep it to herself. it hurt at first to hear that aran had never told her that he and bokuto were more than just friends, but she had to understand. she didn't tell aran about her growing attraction for akaashi, so she wasn't the one to judge.
"i'm so jealous of you, yn." she heard a voice from her side, and it was one of her classmates.
"why?" she asked, chuckling.
"all those poems, you really won lottery."
yn was aware that every single student around her had read the poems, posted them online, and shared them with their friends outside of university, she had heard numerous times that she was incredibly lucky from people she had never spoken to.
even though she knew that everyone had their own minds, and it wasn't that difficult to give those poems a chance to sink in and understand everything about them, she just... couldn't take them seriously, couldn't believe they understood and knew what they were jealous about.
all of this was for her. for her to see, for her to read, for her to love, not for them. she was never selfish, but now she couldn't help but wish they hadn't seen those carefully curated lines of words written just for her, so she could be alone with them and hold them close to her heart without sharing.
"i did," she said, laughing softly.
"the second one has to be my favourite," the girl said.
'it is not for you to pick a favorite.'
"oh, yeah?" yn hummed, deciding to concentrate on her notes, which she was copying from the slide of the presentation their professor had shown them.
"yeah, definetly, it was the peak, then the third one was okay and with fourth, he kinda missed," she told her. "still, super romantic to have poems written about you."
yn grabbed her phone and checked the date. it was an even day, which meant takahashi added new pages to the board.
she looked at the slide again, wrote the left text faster, and stood up to leave. the professor had never been against bathroom breaks, and she was about to use one right now. he sat behind his desk, bored, and began clicking something on his personal laptop. yn knew that she's gonna make it even before he thinks about turning to the next slide.
the doors to the lecture hall closed quietly behind her, and she dashed to the bulletin board. her classes were close by, if they were in another building, she'd wait until they finished before running here.
there it was, a fourth poem with a glass cover addressed to her.
'to yn, why do they only see a shell over your soul? it's shining like the brightest star, opalizing with colors, and i can't lie, you're what eyes want to see as the last thing before losing sight, but touching your soul would be a gift i can't compare to any other. why do they only see the pearl, not that it's formed around a grain of sand in pain? they roll it around in their hands to see it glow. i want to watch you, see everything clearly, and hear your spirit sing softly or not at all.'
for the first time, yn felt confused after reading. she understood everything perfectly, it touched her heart that someone wanted to see her, but... she recognized those words. she heard them somewhere, and the end of the poem felt strangely familiar.
'akaashi,' she thought immediately, and then chuckled bitterly. 'god, someone just poured out their soul for me, and the first thing i think of is akaashi?'
isn't it much easier if it was him?
yn stopped her steps.
she returned to the poem, trying to figure out where she might have picked up those words, but nothing came to mind.
maybe having it in her hand would help her. that's why she thought of akaashi, of course, he was the only person who could help her get the poem off the bulletin board, as well as the only person who could help her figure out if it was something from another poem, book, or somewhere else.
