Breaking free

Episode 42

" I'm going to tell you something. Hear me out." He held my hand and I nodded.

" I'm sick."

" Sick kuma?" I shifted in my seat.

" Not physically. I have a rare mood disorder that causes emotional ups and downs. I have had it since I was a young boy and the doctor said it can be maintained. But I haven't been taking my drugs for about 4 years, it is starting to affect my mental state." He said looking at me.

I lowkey felt dumb because how come, my husband, has a mental sickness and I'm just finding out after almost 7 years of marriage? I held my head with two hands.

" Say something" He pleaded.

" Why are you just telling me now?" I asked.

" I just didn't want you to worry and think of me differently." He replied.

" But I'm your wife, I need to know. I have a right." I stood up.

" I'm sorry."

I paced the room and a thought came to my head.

" Wait, is that the reason you have been abusive?" I stopped in front of him.

" I'm going to talk to Daddy. This marriage won't work, I'll only hurt you and that's the last thing I want. I have already hurt you so I think it's enough."

" No. No, after all this time, you want to give up. Can't you see the love I have for you, if it was another woman, do you think she would stay after all that abuse? Ahmad, you need to deal with your problems and not run away from them."

" I do and I appreciate you but staying with me will only be worse. There will be times when you won't recognize me when I will be so angry, I'll cause too much damage. "

" And I'll stand by you till the end."

" No Hameedah. You won't so it's better to end this here. I divo-" I put my lips on his and it turns into a hot make-out session. I backed away and looked into his eyes, he looked so sad.

" Don't dare say that. I'm here for you and you don't have to do this alone. I would do my best to be the best wife to you because I made a promise to myself. I just need you to control your anger more, it will also affect you more. Take care of yourself, if not for me but for your kids, they love you a lot. I love you a lot." I said.

" I don't know what I did to deserve a person like you. I love you so much, Babe. Please forgive me." He cupped my face.

" I have, I just need a little more time." I smiled.

" I-" He was cut off with the loud cry of Bamanga.

" Back to reality." I stood up but he pulled me down.

" Let me." He disappeared to the office and came back with a quiet Bamanga in his arms. He took the feeder from the baby bag and began feeding him.

" Not gonna lie, it feels weird you taking care of him like this," I said honestly.

" I'm also sorry for that. Been caught up and neglected my duties towards them, I promise to do better." He said which made me smile.

" It's ok. InshaAllah." I rested my face on my palm and looked at them sideways.

" I'm hungry." I held my stomach.

" Let's go somewhere." He stood up and dragged me up. I took the baby bag and by the time we went out, it was almost maghrib so we went to City View because the food was nice and there was a praying area for Ahmad.

He drove this time and I held Bamanga as we talked about random things, it was abnormal but I had a good time. We reached the restaurant and we ordered the food and while we were waiting, Ahmad went to pray.

" Ma'am, the table over there has sent you some samosas and spring rolls." The waiter dropped the starters and nudged towards a table by our right.

" Why?" I looked at them and it was a table full of men staring at me. I began feeling uncomfortable.

" I don't know Ma'am." He stood.

" Ok, thank you." I smiled and he walked away.

Ahmad came back and he asked who ordered it. There was no use to lie since we just started afresh so I just told him the truth.

" Stupid men" He took a sip of his drink.

Our main courses came and we ate. The food today wasn't as good as the normal day but it was still good. The ambiance of the restaurant was calm and slow. He paid and went back home. I ordered a Pizza for the twins because they have been begging me to get some.

" Pizza!" Amma ran to us and almost knocked my over.

" Hankali" I removed my veil.

I kept it on the table and put some for them. I went to our room to take a shower and removed the atampa. Ahmad came in when I was in my panties and bra with the training belt over my stomach.

" This thing isn't too tight." He touched the belt.

" I'm used to it, and if I don't tie it very tight, my stomach won't go back to normal and I don't want that." I released my hair and brushed it into a high bun.

" Oh, do you need help?" He asked.

" With showering, I'm good." I smiled and took a towel. I bathed all the sweat away and came out drying my body with the other towel. He was still in the room so I sat the vanity and oiled my body, the doctor gave me a specific oil to apply on my stomach. I applied it and wore a two pice short red pajama and put my hair in a silk scarf.

" Let me put those kids to sleep." I hanged the towel and went out. It was past nine and they were still awake.

" Switch off this TV and go to sleep." I leaned by the stairs.

" Maama one more episode." Awwal said still looking at the TV.

" No, go upstairs now." I said sternly.

" Maama-" I gave him a hard stare and Amma switched off the TV and they went upstairs. They brushed their teeth and performed ablution before laying in bed.

" Twin, Maama so small." Amma said and I burst out laughing.

" Maama big Amma, now goodnight." I put my hands on their head and recited some supplications for them before leaving the room. Ahmad was standing right in front of me, the hallway was dark so I couldn't really see. I could tell he was holding something, I had to strain my eyes, it was flowers and he handed it to me.

" For you." He handed it to me and placed his arm over my shoulder as we walked back to the room. He pushed me against the door immediately the door was closed, he began kissing me. I kissed him back and that I guess gave him an invitation, I don't know how but we ended up on the bed still making out.

" 3 more weeks." I held his chest trying to catch my breathe. His hand was already in my top so he slowly removed it.

" Fuck." He muttered and laid down on his back and I laughed.

We laid down and he pulled me to him, I was laying on his bare chest and it felt so good because it was warm and the room was cold. I closed my eyes so savor this moment because I knew bad ones were to come in the future. I signed up for this and their is no way I can back away now. Not like this.

Hi Humans.

This chapter isn't long but we now know the deal between Haidar and Ahmad

Do you think what Ahmad did was justified or wrong?

Bye.