she's very pretty (jenlisa)

Chapter 41

26th of August, 2016
(7 days since last chapter)

lisa drove through the dark night, her hands tight on the steering wheel as she stopped at a red light, exhaling slowly as she stared up at the glaring light, squinting slightly.

it was 10pm, and the blonde was driving back from dance practice; she would never admit to herself that she was good enough at dancing, because that would mean she was just okay at dancing. so she spent way longer than she needed to practicing.

at this point, it had become a coping mechanism for the 17 year old. something was wrong? dance. and she would.

she would dance til her joints would crack in pain when she walked the next morning. she would practice til she could taste blood in the back of her throat, breathing heavily as she stared at herself, bent over in the mirror.

jesus christ.

she danced and danced til it hurt, til she couldn't hear her own thoughts, til her head was spinning, til her eyes lost focus.

til she collapsed.

lisa snapped out of her thoughts, breathing heavily as she slammed down the accelerator, speeding through the night.

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jennie didn't say anything to lisa the other night when she broke down crying, sobbing violently as she pushed the key in further, her chest wracking with cries of distress.

the sound haunted her.

chaeyoung had pulled lisa up, holding her gently as she led the blonde back to her room, and jennie just stood there in the hallway, staring blankly at her best friend.

like when you hurt someone physically and they start crying and everyone's making sure they're okay, but you're just left to stand there watching it all unfold, self hatred swallowing you like a pill.

jennie glued her eyes to the ceiling as she slept on the couch for the 5th time.

the clock ticked quietly, the quiet rattle of utensils and pans in the kitchen as jisoo prepared some sort of dessert.

jennie wasn't hungry.

she blinked quickly, her eyes wide as she came back to reality.

they really needed a new couch, this one is incredibly uncomfortable.

"jennie! ta-da! milk ice cream and fruit! your favourite!" jisoo exclaimed, walking slowly into the living room as she balanced three bowls in her arm, smiling awkwardly.

jennie rolled her eyes, getting up quickly to help jisoo, as rosie who was also sitting on the couch staring aimlessly at the ceiling woke up from her daydreaming quickly, sitting up and greedily grabbing her bowl.

"when was lisa supposed to be getting back?" rosie queried, ruining the silence with a question that no-one really knew the answer to these days.

she would come home late, sore and tired. she rarely hung out with the girls during dinner and a movie.

everytime rosie felt like she broke through to the old lisa, chuckling and smiling, the next day she was back to normal.

she was stuck in an endless loop; wake up, feel shit, dance so you feel like you have a purpose, feel even more shit because you've overworked yourself, and sit awake in your bed wondering where everything went wrong.