Trades Aplenty and Babies' Crash Course🍼

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DANNNNTTTEEE! I NEED HELLLLLP! WAHHHHHHHHHH!

Dante had been rushing up and down the stairs of the house, the horrid screams of a woman ringing through his ears and a baby crying. Our hooper had been carrying a pair of fresh diapers, baby powder, pacifiers and freshly made baby bottles to placate their crying. The undrafted NBA player turned superstar had been running himself ragged but then again, he and girlfriend Hailee Steinfeld were two people who never backed away from a challenge be it in the art of entertainment, music, sports or athletics. After tripping up the spiral column of stairs with scratches and a bloody cut on his right elbow which he would deal with later, he entered the twins' bedroom to find an equally frazzled Hailee, hair tousled, heavy bags under her eyes.

Hailee: Can you PLEASSSSEEEEE take that one? This one in my arms hasn't been so much as a problem, just a quick feeding, diaper change and hopefully they'll be too tired to put up a fight.

Dante: Yeah, yeah. Hand 'em over, sweetheart. Now, what's this I hear about you giving your mama bear fits?

The baby simply coos as it transitions from one parents' arms to the other, its hissy fit soon ceasing to exist.

Dante: That's okay, I'm gonna get you right to the point where you're the perfect little stinker for mommy while daddy handles that light work tonight.

Hailee: Another *yawn* game?

Dante: Yeah.... I hate doing you like this baby girl. But this grind never really stops until the dog days of summer.

Hailee: Figures..... it's just that-

Baby: You stupid fuckers-

They look at each other, as if they were the ones the who cursed before looking at the baby in Dante's arms, pacifier now dislodged and an evil smirk.

Hailee: I'm sorry, who do you think you're talking-

Baby #1: Silence, birth-giver! You forgot we're the ones who run shit now, my twin and I. It doesn't matter where your careers take you, at the end of the day, for the next eighteen years, you answer to us.

Baby #2: Yeah, now see here. It don't matter if ya's produce another killer song or you drop 101 points, you're our bitches.... hey old man?

Dante: I know this little shit slinger is NOT talking to me-

Baby #2: What you gonna do if I am. I need a pamper change, not a lecture. And bad luck for you, HGNNNNNNN-

Suddenly a foul stench bereaves both Hailee and Dante's noses and before they knew it, the gangland speaking baby had somehow wormed its way out of its Huggies Pamper which was completely soiled which they then aimed squarely at their father's face.

Baby #2: I hope you and mommy got plenty of face wash, sucker!

Dante: NOOO-

Dante: AHHHHHH!

He springs up from his pillow screaming, sweat beading from his forehead just as Hailee wakes up alarmed at her boyfriend's sudden awakening.

Hailee: Dante? Hey, hey! Easy there, babe! You had a nightmare, you're okay. Try to relax.

Dante: Hai-lee? Ugh.... what time is it?

Hailee: It's only 2:30 in the morning. Nightmare, I take it?

Dante: The worst one since we found out we were having twins. I mean, Christ, one of the babies sounded like your standard-fare gangster from the 1920's.

You've reached the end of published parts.

⏰ Last updated: Oct 01 ⏰

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