Behind the Scenes

Chapter 64

Mikha's POV

Do you know how it feels when you badly want to do something, but thinking about the circumstances that may occur if you forced it to happen is making you crazy and you just.. okay, I'd rather wait for the right time.

Before I met her, I used to believe that if someone rejected me and don't want my presence anymore.. then be it. I'm not going to chase anyone. I don't need someone by my side just to feel happy.

Well, yes.. I can be the old Mikha without her, but.. I feel incomplete. There is this bugging feeling.. a hole in my heart, a missing piece.. that only her can fill in.

I'm hurt but I know there is a bigger reason as to why she ended up with that decision. I will wait until she's ready to unfold the purpose behind it.

"Mikha!" Staku shouted.

She's in my passenger seat and we're on our way to A's condo.

"W-what? Staks! stop shouting at me, we're just inches apart, for Pete's sake!"

"Oh wow? really? I thought you were on the other side of the world, just a minute ago. Is spacing out your new hobby these days?" she asked annoyed.

"Okay, sorry. I'm just.." I sighed and I didn't bother to hide the sadness in my face. "I miss her, Staks." I said almost whisper.

"I know, Mikhs. We.. the girls knows and we feel bad for what's happening between the two of you and about ate Aiah's condition. That's why here I am, I cancelled my pamper day just so you can go to her without being awkward."

"Thank you, Staks. I promise to treat you all, once we got back together." I joked.

I'm gonna cry if we continue to talk about A's situation right now.

"Hi ate Aiah!" Staku greeted her as soon as we came in.

"Hello, Staks and Hi M." she said weakly.

"We brought foods from your favorite restaurant, A. And.. uh, of course.. your fruits." I informed her and proceed to the kitchen.

"Thank you, but.. you don't have to do this, M."

"You're welcome A, and please.. just let me do this."

"What's that? ate Aiah?" I heard Staku asked.

"Ah, just.. my daily journal. I feel like.. maybe writing whatever comes to my mind.. will somehow help me with what I'm going through." she answered.

"That's actually good, at least you have something to do. Uhm, anything that interests you right now aside from writing?"

"I just want.. to stay here, reading books and sometimes watching movies or documentaries that I find appealing. But.. most of the time.. I just.. don't wanna do anything."

"A.. how 'bout jogging at night? You want me to call Fons and Ria-"

she cut me off.

"-No, I don't even get excited to jog. I just wanna stay indoor. I.." she paused and keeps on fidgeting. "the noises.. makes me want to run somewhere. I'm afraid to experience panic attack in front of many people." I saw her tearing up. "I-I'm.. not confident to walk outside this place, anymore.. and just.. thinking about all the things that I find scared to do now is.. making me anxious."

Staku move to hug her and my heart broke into tiny pieces, seeing her like this.

This is not my Aiah. I need my bubbly A, back.

"Ano na mga ate ko? we need to think of something." Sheena asked acting like she's really thinking.

"I can't think of anything anymore. We already tried dozen of times, but.. seems like she's enjoying her alone time and doesn't want to come back with us." Staku said in defeat.